h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

wow noone's ever thrown up on me over the internet before. occasionally at parties I get that kind of thing. usually about when Ricky Martin comes on the stereo and I start like I have an aubergine for an anal implant,,,

funny, he was worse in menudo.... anal, eh? Livin the vida loca, getting puked on all ova.

Come to think of it i was puked on last year, and in person too! I passed out at a party with my favortist pink velux blanket, and I woke up and found some guy sleeping near me, so I got up and as i tried to get the blanket away from his sleeping form, i guess i was sort of violently shaking him, he puked on my hand and the blanket. I'm just very glad i had gotten up before he did it. Though he did puke all over my prize possession pink velux blanket.(i tried to cut holes in it where he puked on it, which didn't work well, its half a blanket now) I don't use it anymore, i give it to other people to use, people who don't know its been puked upon.

stink.
the worst vomiten story I ever heard was from an art-school student friend who took life-drawing classes where they had a hairy russian woman modelling, whom they called bababushka. anyway, on this particular day the classroom was really hot and unventilated and about half way through she passed out and threw up all over herself so the poor lady was lying completely naked in front of an art class with yucky vomitzen all over her.

omigosh that's terrible. Aww, what a poor hairy russian lady! Perhaps the students could have drawn her that way, it should be beautiful in its own way right? I don't understand the whole nude model thing. I mean I know that the human form is supposedly the most beautiful artform, and blah blah, it just seems very suspicious to me that's all. I really don't quite know if I've formed an opinion of it and I suppose that I don't really have to....hmm

well if you'd known bababushka you wouldn't accuse the students of being there just to perv. unless it was "life drawing for sickos". wash my mouth out everyone is beautiful. somebody hit me with the PC cattleprod...

Its not the perv thing I'm really getting at....I don't know spontaneity is nice you know. Just painting a person you don't know.... Sorta dry. But I suppose its good for practice, it was a class all in all. I'll only lightly tap you with a pc cattleprod/ and you can wash your mouth out with some southern comfort. Beep/

yes I prefer spontaneous drawings of small items of office stationery or scribble men.

thankyou of course I only use southern comfort for mouth-washing purposes. I'm not an alcoholic. is it my fault it sometimes takes a whole bottle? I say some offensive things sometimes. sometimes the mouthwash just makes the torrent of abuse more offensive, which leads - via a rather simple yet incredibly vicious cycle (ie. bicycle with big teeth that eats children) - of course to the imbibing of further alcamaholey.

Perusal and abusal, mmm.....soco. I don't really like to many of the intoxicating sprits until i'm dashing up into strangers housing asking them if i live there, then i like other stuff ,my step one is always beer(germans hate our beer here! i like it just fine) and soco is the only liquor i can drink straight and in vast quantities....but after the 7th drink everything except (in my previous experience) Sambuca goes down nicely including machinery, oak furniture and gravel( from me drunkenly stumbling and smacking my face into the ground).... do you have the same liquors in nz?? ( Or am i just blithering and babbling (as usual) incoherently at you via computer.) I'm not using my parenthesis well today))))))

Now does this incredibly vicious bycycle with teeth that eats small children (perhaps even large ones) automatically come out with every consumption?? If so you should patent yourself. I'd buy one. The amount of mouthwash is usually and apparently proportionate to the size of your mouth therefore.....

if you are foisting upon me the implication that my mouth is big then I might point out that the somewhat unconventional usage of said alcoholic spiritual enlightenment as mouthwash is accentuated by the unconventional practice of swallowing it rather than gargling a bit, swishing it about and then splishing it back into the sink.
having said this I do not drink very often or too much. we do have good beer here which I whole-liver-ly support but I only hook into the strong spirits when I'm overcome by the urge to forget my name, throw up on my friends and their pets and wake up in a tree in a strange suburb. only once or twice a month, then.

vicious bicycle - free with every alcoholmic, alcomaldris sold separately from bleuurghitoys...