h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

"I think I found out why none of my relationship have no future: I always end up being morbidly jealous of her because I love her more than I love myself"

Let me rephrase that:

"I think I found out why none of my relationship have any future: I always end up being morbidly jealous of her because I love her more than I love myself"

Both versions look the same to me.

Spot the difference:

>>have no future<<
>>have any future<<

This is in quotes so I'm assuming is not talking about himself,

GB
(still virtually engaged to for about 15 years now...

Yep, on Wednesday it will be my 16th hootoo-burp-day so our anniversary can't be far off

Now back to the challenge at hand. Obviously the poor guy can't break up with himself. What is he to do?

I suggested he could move to India and live on a mountain top. I hear there is a region there filled to the rim with recluse hermits pondering life, universe and everything - including jealousy and sibling rivalry between split personalities

I have no hope of spotting discrepancies.
I haven't any hope of spotting discrepancies.

Is that clear now?

What you need to compare is:

"none of my relationship have no future"

"none of my relationship have any future"

and besides "relationship" should of course be "relationships"

But let us not quibble over insignificant details. Everybody understood quite clearly what I meant and it is only my perfectionism - honed by w*rking 26 years as a sub-editor - that craves - well, perfectionism - of me. It really shouldn't

I was closer to perfection when my vision and fingers were better. Now I make more and more typos, and I notice them less and less.

... Do consider a relation with a dog ... dogs will love you no matter what.


.. No, Pierce .. I didn't mean *that*

by the way .. "hi"

To be on thew safe side, you might want to feed your dog regularly. When archaeologists excavated the ruins of Pompeii, they found the skeletons of a dog who was trapped with his master by the lava. They survived the eruption, but couldn't escape to freedom. The man did not eat the dog to stay alive, but the dog ate the man. Apparently.

BABETTE!

Long time no write. Good to hear from you again

Nah, are too much w*rk. They are edible, of course, but as long as I can go shopping or call for meals on wheels there's hardly any need

I think my point was, that to your dog *you* are edible.

...the stories I could tell about some of the things a pet 'woof' I used to have would drag home from the roaddide...

re post 12:

Oh, I got your point alright, paulh, but as you mentioned yourself if the man had made up his mind quicker he could have eaten the instead of being eaten by it

I once knew a werewolf. In the biblical sense even (if that is possible, does the Bible mention werewolves ) so you see I'm not easily scared

I don't think eating your dog is preferable to be eaten by it. Either way you're dead in a dark bubble of ash. I hate to think of that poor dog trapped, starving, frightened, alone and desperate. >shudder<

I hate to think of it, too.

Anyone who had jumped on a horse and fled Pompeii at the beginning of the smoke plume would have time to get to safety -- if they had gone in the right direction. Fleeing to the shore of Herculaneum would have been problematic, as the lava traveled 600 feet into the sea along that beach. One of the Plinys [Plinies?] was in a boat, and sailed to safety. There might not have been enough boats for all the people who wanted to escape. Those who were good swimmers might have been able to get far enough out to sea, but who would have known in advance where the lava was going to go?

Nowadays, a car *might* be able to outrun the wall of lava, but again if the lava traps the car on the beach [which it might do], escape will be futile. Okay, okay, if you jumped out of the car and into a helicopter or fast boat, but what if you didn't have those at your disposal?

Yes, the vast majority did flee to safety. (It was dust and ash, not lava that trapped those who remained or returned.) There were around 2000 victims in a city of 20,000.

I had just recently read about Pompeii and didn't previously realize that those "bodies" were plaster casts of the holes (voids) left behind.

http://www.slate.com/blogs/atlas_obscura/2015/03/12/plaster_casts_of_victims_bodies_at_pompeii_in_italy.html

So, roughly 90% of the people had the good sense to leave when they could. That speaks well for them.