h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Doctor and therapist both say I should stay home to recover from the depression. So here I am. Still in bed, with laptop on my lap, not doing much.

I dread telling my employer. The coach is fine, very supportive, but the actual boss is strange. She asked me if I could name someone to take over my tasks... how the hell should I know, I'm too new to know people, and I can hardly make a decision to get out of bed to go to the loo!

As long as I don't speak to anyone, it's ok-ish. Just very empty. But as soon as I talk to someone about how I feel, it's very hard and I cry a lot.

So. Here I sit. Not doing much, feeling lonely, and dreading to make contact.

Just do it -the longer you wait, the more you'll dread it and it won't be half as bad as you imagined but you'll feel much better afterwards.

Do whatever it needs to do to make you feel better.

I just emailed my coach. And I hope I won't have to talk to the boss woman!

Thank BoB there is some sunshine. Although, the heavy rains we had yesterday suit my mood better.


I can't believe how the tears keep dripping!

I wish I knew what I need to feel better!

For now, I just prefer not to make decisions. Even getting lunch will be tough, I probably need to go to the shop.

I'm sorry it's hit you that hard.

It's a bit unreal. I have been depressed before, and this is probably not the worst bout I've had. But it might be the first time that I admit it full out, and not ignore it.
I wish I had someone to feed me, to make the errands for me, to let me be small and helpless for a while.
And at the same time, I fear that if I let go, and let myself feel the full force of this, it's perhaps worse than I thought.

Perhaps I should read something instead.

thanks for your and

Just sorry there isn't anything 'real' I can do.

It helps that you're here. It really does, to know that I'm not completely cut off from the world, to know you are listening.

(no pressure... <evligrin&gt

It makes me put words to what I feel, and I need that, I think. I'm so used to hide my feelings, to ignore them and move on like nothing happened, to pretend everything is fine. I had so many years of practice - so now, to get in touch with myself, it's a little difficult.

thanks again.

I do like the

I know how it is when you have to keep going and nobody is there you can fall back on when you need it.

I've been thinking of you, you seem to have a tough situation too, always being taken for granted...

Yes, but it's got a lot better now that the boys are grown. They do support me, which is great. It's different for you, though, cause your chuldren are still small.

But my daughter is getting very supportive. I don't want her to have to be, but it is a comfort. She is already 14...

As long as she doesn't forget to enjoy herself, I think it's OK if she supports you, especially if it's her own decision.

She plays a lot with friends, so I think she is ok. And she is so sweet.

I sent you an e-mail, Milla...

My sons are sweet, too. My eldest (who moved out a couple of months ago) still comes here nearly every day for a hug and a chat.

replied

I followed the move out thread for a while, but it ran away from me, moving too fast... I trust he is happy to be on his own, even though he comes back for comfort?

I think he misses the family life, which is why he comes here so regularly. Which is nice. When I was his age, I couldn't wait to finally live on my own, and oh, how I enjoyed it once I did. I didn't miss my parents one bit.