h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The author will be aware that there is activity in the threads he/she is subscribed to, so I don't see the point in telling them.

GVI, it wasn't meant to be an anti-Christian rant at all. I try to make it a point not to offend people on their religions; I'm sorry if it came across that way. Perhaps I should add a disclaimer explaining that these (Christian and not-so-Christian) really do seem to be the most common type of bumper stickers, and that I was merely trying to comment on the "war" (for lack of a better word) between those who bear the Jesus-type stickers, and those who bear the snotty retorts. I, personally, think it's hilarious to watch, and that's all I was trying to convey. I do *not* go around bashing Christians. I'm glad, however, that you saw it; I didn't think people would take it that way, and since I now realize that they might (and why), I can try to fix it up a bit so it won't seem quite so harsh.

And I have stated that the article you read was a rough draft. Even I still think it needs a lot of work.

I will, however, take your other suggestions into consideration (namely the first-person part; that should be easy enough to fix), and if someone wants to bump me over to to workshop, fine. Since I'm still pretty new at this and have yet to master the art of succint, coherent writing, I'm up for any help someone cares to give me.

Whoops! I wasn't paying close enough attention and posted this to the wrong place. Try, try again....

GVI, it wasn't meant to be an anti-Christian rant at all. I try to make it a point not to offend people on their religions; I'm sorry if it came across that way. Perhaps I should add a disclaimer explaining that these (Christian and not-so-Christian) really do seem to be the most common type of bumper stickers, and that I was merely trying to comment on the "war" (for lack of a better word) between those who bear the Jesus-type stickers, and those who bear the snotty retorts. I, personally, think it's hilarious to watch, and that's all I was trying to convey. I do *not* go around bashing Christians. I'm glad, however, that you saw it; I didn't think people would take it that way, and since I now realize that they might (and why), I can try to fix it up a bit so it won't seem quite so harsh.

And I have stated that the article you read was a rough draft. Even I still think it needs a lot of work.

I will, however, take your other suggestions into consideration (namely the first-person part; that should be easy enough to fix), and if someone wants to bump me over to to workshop, fine. Since I'm still pretty new at this and have yet to master the art of succint, coherent writing, I'm up for any help someone cares to give me.

Argh!

Sorry for the double posting, guys. Not thinking too clearly today.

On a personal note, I pulled up to a stop light the other day behind a truck bearing the sticker "Real men love Jesus." If he was such a real man, then why did his registration stickers expire 4 months ago?

Okay, where is all this anti-Christian stuff? All I saw in the entry was a description of what's going on, albiet reinforcing some stereotypes along the way (but then, it really IS that sort of person who often has the fish on their car, so what's the problem?).

Mr. T, I think GVI was right. I'll admit to being one of the snotty retort people (to a small extent), and I can kinda see where those sentiments actually slipped into the entry, or at least how someone would read anti-Christian sentiments into it. I don't want to pick on 'em, because they fight BACK!

hmm... i personally don't see any anti-christian sentiments. then again, i am not christian. (going off on a tangent, i find that people are wholly oversensitive, but we're not discussing that)

i like your entry a lot, but i would certainly ask a christian friend or acquaintance to look it over and let you know if they are offended by anything. sometimes it's good to get someone else's POV. perhaps those people who commented above are trying to tell you something!!!

all in all, a very good entry. i enjoyed it greatly!

Well, conventiently, I am a Christian, but a Christian who doesn't think cheesy bumper stickers do a lot for the faith apart from reinforce unfortunate steretypes etc.

Here's a breakdown of my opinions, if it helps at all:

"Something Christianity-themed, including but not limited to: "No Jesus, No Peace/Know Jesus, Know Peace"; "We belive in Jesus"; "God is my Co-Pilot" (or, for the even more religious folk, "God is my Pilot"); "My Boss is a Jewish Carpenter", and many, many, many more."

No problems there.

"*"Jesus is coming! Look busy!"
*"Jesus loves you. Everyone else thinks you're an asshole."
*"God was my co-pilot, but we crashed into a mountain and I had to eat him.""

Possibly not very good taste, but amusing nonetheless. If people really have these stickers, then the problem would be with them - not with your article about them.

"The Jesus Fish, as it is known, is a chromed plastic fish with the word "Jesus" or some symbol of the Christian faith inside it. It is placed on the trunk or in another conspicuous spot. The Jesus Fish appears on a startling array of cars, including some that should by all rights be plastered with anti-middle-class sentiments, but is most often seen on minivans, luxury cars like Cadillacs and Lincolns driven by blue-haired old ladies, and anything driven by an African-American or person of Hispanic descent. In England, it most often appears stuck to the back end of a Volvo, driven by a non-descript lady in glasses and a cardigan."

Well, this seems, in my experience, to be true, but from a Scouting viewpoint I think that if you did a survey, there'd be a great deal of people with fish on their cars who are NOT non-descript ladies in glasses and cardigans.

"About five years ago, some non-Christian people got tired of the Jesus Fish and made their own Fish: It had legs, and the word "Darwin" inside the Fish body. The Darwin Fish took hold slowly at first, but has finally taken its place beside the Jesus Fish as most common car decoration. The Jesus Fish people, however, are greatly disturbed by this and wish to make their feelings clear. To that end, they devised the Truth Fish: A Jesus Fish with "Truth" inside the Fish body. Its open mouth is devouring a Darwin Fish. The Darwin Fish camp has yet to come up with a snappy Fish retort to this, but are presumeably working on it.


*Note* After this researcher thought she had finished this entry, she found the long-awaited Snappy Truth Fish Send-up. It consists of an Evolution Fish (a Darwin Fish with the word "Darwin" replaced with "Evolution") doing something rather nasty to a Jesus fish. This researcher is eagerly awaiting the Jesus Fish camp's reaction."

Nothing wrong with this - you're just stating what's going on. And very silly it is too.

Personally, I don't see the point in the fish. I mean, are they a secret badge which, when placed on your car, means you won't be arrested for speeding or what?

Whoo!

Thanks, Mr. T, for the analysis. Much appreciated.

I did try to make sure I stated that the Jesus Fish (and related whatnots) can appear on just about any vehicle; I was just trying to describe the places it usually seems to end up. (With a little help from a U.K. scout.)

You know, I've never understood the point of the Jesus Fish, myself. Maybe it's like a dashboard Mary or something; they stick it on there in the hopes that it will keep them from getting hit, find them good parking spaces, etc. I honestly have no idea. But hey...if it makes 'em happy to put it on there, then they should go right on ahead and have their Jesus Fish. It certainly isn't going to do the rest of us any harm.

Whoo!

Thanks, Mr. T, for the analysis. Much appreciated.

I did try to make sure I stated that the Jesus Fish (and related whatnots) can appear on just about any vehicle; I was just trying to describe the places it usually seems to end up. (With a little help from a U.K. scout.)

You know, I've never understood the point of the Jesus Fish, myself. Maybe it's like a dashboard Mary or something; they stick it on there in the hopes that it will keep them from getting hit, find them good parking spaces, etc. I honestly have no idea. But hey...if it makes 'em happy to put it on there, then they should go right on ahead and have their Jesus Fish. It certainly isn't going to do the rest of us any harm.

OK, I just want you guys to know that I'm doing this from work, and there is something wrong with my proxy server that is, in a roundabout sort of way, causing these double posts. Please just ignore them.

My favorites: "Warning! I Drive Like You Do! and " I Brake for Hallucinations"

In the UK there are an increasing number of cars sporting the Saltire or St Andrews Cross, (white, diagonally on dark blue) denoting Scotland; or the Black and White St Piran's Cross (white on a black background) denoting Cornwall. The Welsh have their red dragon I guess, but I notice it less.

You also used to see bumper stickers in Scotland saying "I am a Real Scot from ... [Some Scottish Town]". I longed to see ones saying "I am a Real Scot from England"...

Whatever happened to those stickers saying "Recycled Ferrari"? And doesn't "My other car is a Porsche" appear in book one of the Hitch Hikers Guide?

Incidentally, you can find more bumper stickers than you would ever really want to know about at: http://www.snapdragongifts.com/

Nice entry, btw.

Incidentally, Snapdragon sell the Darwin fish, and an Alien fish as well. And www.thinkgeek.com sell Linux fishes, and oval stickers saying things like C++ and JVA.

They also have a single volume of the famous trilogy in four parts, which includes a story "Young Zaphod Plays it Safe". Anyone know anything about this? (Topic drift... sorry).

Er, I think it's a trilogy in FIVE parts (at least, my copy is!).

'Young Zaphod Plays it Safe' is a short story based on charcters from the HHGTG. I've got it in some 'tales of comic fantasy/SF' compilation book. Hope it helps.

[veers back to topic]

Hi,

I've submitted this article to the Powers in the Towers for inclusion in the edited guide - they agree that it is great, and have accepted it!
This thread will soon move off the PR page, and your article will be given to a sub-ed for final editing. You'll be emailed when it is all finished, but be patient - the whole process can take quite a while.

Well done!

- Adam

Then there is the bumper sticker gratuitously applied by the service station when you take your car in for service, turning your vehicle into a free mobile advertising billboard for them.

Editorial Note: This thread has been moved out of the Peer Review forum because this entry has now been recommended for the Edited Guide.

If they haven't been along already, the Scout who recommended your entry will post here soon, to let you know what happens next. Meanwhile you can find out what will happen to your entry here: http://www.h2g2.com/SubEditors-Process

Congratulations!

Hello, I'll be your in-flight sub-editor for today. If there are any last minute changes you wish to make, any time now would seem to be the best point to let me know!!

- Slash & Burn Editing!