h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/wordofmouth/2016/jan/05/ten-ways-improve-british-food-drink-2016-wish-list

Well, they call them pot pies here, I think, but a 'casserole with a puff pastry lid' is what I've been disappointingly served in too many British pubs, and since I've only been in the UK for a total of four weeks since I left the shores of Blighty (the last time was more than seven years ago I think) 16 years ago, they're obviously not something new.

What the heck is a "listicle"? He made that up.

Some people call them pot pies here, but to me, a pot pie also is surrounded in pastry.

Sadly, maybe, pot pies were always frozen food when I was a kid. Some were decent, some not so.


When the Marie Claire chain of restaurants arose, I heard that they served great pot pies. I picked up a couple of frozen Marie Claire pot pies in the store and they were pretty good as they go. When I finally went to an actual restaurant and ordered a pot pie, I was disappointed to find that it didn't have a proper shell, just a cap.

They're still tasty, but it's not a pie, pot or not.


Oh, and coincidentally, I just saw a mini cottage pie recipe video on boofcake that was interesting. It features a baked or microwave "baked" thin skinned potato. The top is cut off and the middle is scooped out and smashed. The filling is added to the empty potato and the mash is squeezed out pastry style from a plastic bag with the corner cut out to make a new top.

After a brief search I found a link: http://youtu.be/3xlq03yApZA

I wish he'd just made up "listicle", but listicles are indeed how much "news" is delivered these days thanks to the likes of BuzzFeed and all those former sources of "journalism" that now copy that style.

I'm seriously tired of lists. Well, that's not actually true in the sense they tire me out, because I hardly bother with them now, except for rare occasions such as this article. Sadly though, both the Guardian and the Independent seem to be obsessed with them; the BBC less so, and those are my three main sources of online news (NPR being my main broadcast source).

No, I mean I'm tired of seeing them, and especially of seeing them passed off as journalism, and particularly by serious news organisations such as the two newspapers I mentioned above.

And life's too short for Buzzfeed

I am, as a matter of fact, waiting for the moment when the number of list-related links on the main page of the Guardian or Independent websites reaches a critical mass (the list event horizon? ) so that I can make up a mosaic of them to put either here or on Twotter (or both) with a pithy comment

Cracked occasionally has good ones. At least they're entertaining if not informative. And the listicle format works for a humor site. It gives some spacing for punchlines, I suppose.

But what's really upsetting is how the Houston Chronicle's websites have so fully adopted listicles and slideshows.

I really don't feel like I have any reliable source for local news with any integrity at all. The Galveston County Daily News is incompetent these days and their website is pay-walled. My parents subscribe to it, so I still occasionally scan through it, but when I do I'm usually appalled by their sloppy editing. They typically clip their wire service stories to just the first two to three sentences now, regardless of content.

Seems like the lowest common denominator wins again and news people pander to those with the attention span of a mayfly

Listicle, I guess, is a portmanteau word - list and article. It just better not be anyone's word of the year 11 months from now.

Incepticle:

http://www.wired.com/2014/01/defense-listicle-list-article/

Real journalism? But... but... that might give people.... IDEAS!

Can't be having that.

but that would be called Peak Listicle, Gosho

My grandma used to make a Meat and Tater pie which was a huge deep pie dish full of meat & taters ("Taters? What's taters?") with a very thick suet type pastry crust welded on the top. totes delishballs

(sorry)

But apart from that, a pie must be completely encased in pastry. Soggy bottoms are what people are afraid of these days. And we know who is to blame for that. Yes, Mary Berry, I'm looking at you!

Ooh, meat and tater pie

You're right Sho, a pie should always have a bottom. The only bit that's allowed to be missing is the top, and then it's a tart. Jam tart, apple tart, treacle tart, Bakewell tart.

You're going to have to clue me in about Mary Berry's soggy bottom - this is not something I'm familiar with. I'll give her credit for the ice cream recipe I use though, the one that doesn't need an ice cream maker http://www.bbc.co.uk/food/recipes/no-churn_ice_cream_72012

you've heard, I suppose, of the Great British Bake Off? Whenever they have to make a tart or a pie or something, the first thing they check for is to see if the pastry is cooked underneath. Which manifests itself into the rib-tickling (no, really... ) check if it has a soggy-bottom.

how about Manchester Tart? We used to get those at school and they were lovely.

I've seen a couple of Bake-Off episodes. Not the actual contest but Mary and Paul on their own doing the Masterclass. Personally, I can't stand either Hollywood or Sue Perkins. The Former Mrs Gosho is all over it like a rash though.

I think we've spoken about Manchester tart before. I have this recipe:

Manchester Pudding

This is Mrs Beeton's version of Manchester Tart. She calls it Manchester Pudding but it uses pastry so is really a tart.

Ingredients
75g (3 oz) fresh white breadcrumbs
300ml (10 fl oz) milk
Strips of lemon peel
2 eggs, beaten
2 egg yolks
50g (2 oz) butter
50g (2 oz) sugar, or to taste
225g (8 oz) puff or flaky pastry
3 tbsp brandy

Method
Flavour the milk with the lemon rind by infusing it for about half an hour. Strain it on to the breadcrumbs and boil it for two to three minutes.

Add the eggs, butter, sugar and brandy, mix well together, leave to cool. Meanwhile roll out the pastry and line a pie plate or flan dish.

Spread it with a thick layer of jam, pour on the above mixture and bake for about one hour. Serve cold with a little sugar sprinkled on top.

Mrs Beeton does not give an oven temperature but I would guess it would be about 375°F/190°C/Gas 5, reducing the heat if the top gets too brown.


The website I got it from (http://greatbritishkitchen.co.uk/ ) doesn't exist any more I hope I got all the good stuff from it before it went up.

oh I am totally baking that next time I get the urge for a tart! thank you

I'm not keen on Paul Hollywood, he's far too up himself. But I like Sue Perkins. And I do like watching the programme, I like how they are all so flipping competitive while trying to seem very Britishly non-competitive. Brilliant TV

I want to make either a cake or a pudding today but I have no frozen puff pastry and I'm not in the mood for making any (got too many other things to make already), but I reckon I'll have a crack at this soon.

Did the one they gave you at school have brandy in it?

haha - it was my junior school so no. In my secondary school... well let's say that me and a bottle of brandy in double maths, first period, lead to... things.

This is what I've decided to go with today http://www.bakingbar.co.uk/2013/01/coffee-syrup-cake.html because I've got some Camp Coffee that really needs to be used up. Only problem is, my round cake tins are bigger (9½" as opposed to the 8" in the recipe). I've got two choices: increase the quantities by about a third (because you can't easily have fractions of an egg), or make it in one of my loaf tins.

Which do you think I'm going to do?

Coffee Syrup Cake

Ingredients
For the cake
110g butter
110g caster sugar
2 eggs
90g self raising flour
20g cocoa powder
1½ tbsp instant coffee
2tsp boiling water

For the coffee syrup
50ml boiling water
40g caster sugar
1½ tbsp instant coffee

Method

Preheat the oven to 350F/180C/gas mark 4.

Prepare one approx 20cm cake tin. Cream the butter and sugar together until smooth. Beat in the eggs one at a time until combined. Sieve the flour and cocoa powder together in a separate bowl.

In a small dish mix together the instant coffee with the boiling water and mix together until a smooth coffee mixture is formed. Stir the flour mixture into the cake batter alternating with the coffee mixture until all ingredients are combined. Bake in the centre of the oven for 30-35 mins or until a skewer inserted comes out clean. Allow the cake to cool for 5 mins and then remove from the tin and place on a wire cooling rack.

In a saucepan add the boiling waster, caster sugar and instant coffee and heat on a medium heat until all the sugar dissolves and a smooth syrup is formed. Prick the cake with a fork in a few places to allow the syrup to be absorbed by the cake. Gradually spoon the syrup mixture over the cake slow enough that most of it has time to absorb. Allow the cake to cool completely before slicing.

There is no way on this (or any other) earth that that amount of ingredients is for a 7" cake tin. I used my smallest loaf tin and it was too small even for that.

Smells pretty good though. Taste report to follow... perhaps with coffee-flavoured custard

interesting sounding cake - but more than what size cake tin you used, I'm wondering why on earth you have Camp coffee!