h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I think the Guide's treatment of this subject could be extended to cover the unspoken rules surrounding the discussion of oral sex in everyday life.


For example, adults will take two different tacks: if the conversation is a polite one, they will use a euphemism (and say it softly) along with a slight clearing of the throat or other 'cover' noise. If the discussion is a one-upping contest, they will be as delightfully graphic as the company they are in will allow. Teen agers tend to blush, grin, and use the nastiest language they can think of, in hopes of either impressing or disgusting their friends, which they usually succeed in doing. Children, though Bog alone knows how they learn about it, tend to make faces and use the most childish language they can think up, most likely to indicate their disdain for the subject.

Asking for oral sex from a partner is also a matter for some conversational delicacy. The most polite and reliable method is to offer it, and then tentatively and nicely request it afterwards if it is not immediately offered. Otherwise one must be very careful with the timing: for example, asking for oral sex just after a shouting match is sure to get one into an even worse shouting match, or out of the house entirely. The best bet under any circumstances is to either make sure one's partner has just been well taken care of, or to catch them in an especially cheerful and generous mood.


I have a feeling I could write a great deal more on this topic. However, most of my field research has been operational rather than academic--I haven't the faintest clue about oral sex as a social phenomeneon, likelihood of disease transmission, statistics on how often the average person has it, and so forth.

Would it be against the spirit of the Guide to add a lengthy 'How-To' section to this entry? or, come to think of it, "How-To" sections to all of the entries on sex? If I were a newcomer to Earth, or even a resident looking for advice on how to live on Earth, I would be in need of such entries more than almost any other.

Regards,

Babylon the Small

I'm sure no one will read this either, but I think the oral sex entry could also be expended to include (or at least cross referenced to) any entries on phone sex. Think about it.

simple solution being,once u get past the smell you've got it licked!!!!

shouldn't be too much of a smell, your gals must have summat

To me, how-to entries are the most important part of the guide. I'm surprised there aren't more of them, especially on popular topics like this.