h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Alex is a member of my friendship group and so did not have to 'come in here' as a stranger to participate in the thread, if anyone did, Krabbs.



Jabs

What's the purpose of your words, Jab? Should I be impressed?

after my post No70, I'll equal it up
and lets all call it a draw eh! then no winners no losers if you follow my drift

Why Females Should Avoid A Girls Night Out After They Are Married....


The other night I was invited out for a night with the 'girls.' I told my
Husband that I would be home by midnight, 'I promise!' Well, the hours
Passed and the margaritas went down way too easily. Around 3 a.m., a bit
Loaded, I headed for home.
Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hallway started up and
Cuckooed 3 times. Quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, I
Cuckooed another 9 times.
I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted
Solution, in order to escape a possible conflict with him. (Even when
Totally smashed.. 3 cuckoos plus 9 cuckoos totals 12 cuckoos =MIDNIGHT!)
T he next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, I told him '
MIDNIGHT'... He didn't seem angry in the least.. Whew, I got away with that
One!
Then he said 'We need a new cuckoo clock.' When I asked him why, he said,
'Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times, then said 'oh shit.'
Cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another three times,
Giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the coffee table and
Farted.

I can more than hold my own with cooking, laundry, and dishwashing, but I fear that all my *other* housekeeping skills are extremely poor. Is there such a thing as a housekeeping gene? If so, then it is lacking in both genders in my family.

I have a delightful recurring dream in which my neglect of sweeping my living room floor has allowed so much dirt to pile up that grass and flowers are growing there. I can walk on grass in my bare feet without leaving the house.

Prof post 102:

Paul: How lovely to have grass and flowers for your carpet. Most definitely a "good" dream. I've often thought about using "astroturf'
as carpet, especially in my son's room when younger. It's quite expensive though. I'm not sure whether it's the same as greengrocers "grass".