h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hello, and welcome one and all to the great Masque/ RedFish Campaign Bribe Wine Giveaway! Anyone promising to vote for the Masque for Dictator will recieve a free glass of the Masques Special Red Election Wine. It's a magic brew which adjusts its flavor to the consumer's preference, and gets you only as drunk as you like to be!

As a special bonus, anyone who wishes to be on the Masque/ Red Fish campaign staff recieves a whole bottle of Red Election Wine.

This is just a special promise and demonstration of things to come under Masque rule!

/Red

What a generous offer, Red!
So does that mean I get a whole bottle?

Yes, Darth Noire, you most certainly do get a whole bottle!

~Hands her a bottle of the special wine~

Drink it in good health!

Huzzah! Everyone raise a glass to the man who may put our minds at ease! You have my vote mine commander.

Bad spellers of the world, untie!

*wanders in and glances around for Kes*

*places right hand over left elbow, and turns to face due west*
i hereby pledge my life... er... well... ok, maybe just my vote for now- to Masque!

oh! can i be on the campaign? can i hold TWO Positions, thereby being gifted with a bottle for each hand?

Greetings, Entity! You have chosen wisely indeed to vote for Masque - if you see Kes somewhere else, don't hesitate to mention him who to vote, too.

Entity! Grey Spectre! Welcome to the Wine giveaway! ENTITY, which positions, exactly, would you like to fill? In the meantime, have this glass of wine, on me.

~pours a glass for Entity, and another for Grey Spectre~

*sips carefully from the glass of perfect wine, and begins to feel a perfect buzz almost immediately*

hmmm...
How about Thug #1, and Licker of Envelopes?

no, really! what can i do to be helpful?

~The E

Howabout assistant to Mr. RedFish? (greed is essential for a vizier-to-be)
Or official-gunner-on-the-grassy-knoll?

Anything would be useful to be honest. but until his exellency decides, why not hand out free bottles of this wine in every forum you visit? *passes a crate*

---RedFish
"vote for us, get a free torture kit!"

I think I like "Assistant to Mr. RedFish" and "First Thugh". Here are your two bottles of wine. Now spread the word!

/Red

You have my full support, red! Where's the wine?

*loads crate onto handcart and heads for the door*

You got it! i'm off to troll for votes!

*eyeballing the stacks and stacks of wine-crates*
HELLO! i heard about your campaign from ENTITY!

Hi there, Masque! Was wondering what you've been up to! You have MY vote!

so is there any way I can help the Party? i'm putting up a link from my page, but i'm available for volunteer positions, if you cam make use of me...

*hopes no one guesses the wine to be the motivating factor behind the offer*

i could start by helping to move those!

Thank you, nyc, have a glass ~pours him a glass~

And ZAX, no need to feel guilty about your motivations! Have a drink before you do any of that heavy lifting!

hey masque and redfish! just thought i should drop by. i'm serving red election wine in my Ice Cream Shop too. i won't be partaking in any, though, i don't drink (due to moral qualms) but i'll be voting for you!

... im sure i already knew that.... lol

Masque has vanished..

*DD stumbles in*

Show me the *hic* way to go home
I'm *hic* tired and I want to *hic* go to bed.

poor DD...
*decides to help him home since she is nice and sober*
later, redfish...

*waves* bye..

If we give DD more wine... maybe he'll vote for me? That'd be a great help. He's number two in the polls. The only thing standing between me... and that blasted Celery!