h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I've known mathematicians who tended to go off on tangents.

Linguists who got lost in translation.

Chemists who ate dinner at periodic tables.

Historians who weren't good listeners. Whatever you said went in one era and out the other.

Economists who weren't up on currency events.

Doctors whose bedside manners improved when their patients were young, female, and pretty.

I know a constipated mathematician who worked it out with a slide rule and logs

I never thought of constipated mathematicians. Are there a number of them?

depends of what they eat

if they're not very good, I expect that they'll eat crow from time to time.

hard to swallow if their wrong though

Well, constipation can be helped if you get exercise. Many a mathematician jumps to conclusions or pushed his luck.

How about the engineer who goes nuts and bolts?

Because he tried to build a bridge too far?

That bridge is only one hour's drive from here...

Or maybe the principle of leverage took his brain out for him.