h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I've inputted all the details of the washing machines wo's into the online digital washing machine wo calculator, and the scientific verdict appears to be that the washing machine is officially buggered well at least you have your clothes back... I'd recomend your local laundrette as an alternative for the time being until you have sucessfully gotten the buggered washing machine fixed mind... have you tried kicking it yet? It sometimes works

...or done such a simple thing as RTFM? OK, I know it's very unmanly to RTFM, but it might help.

I RTFM:ed earlier today, and a new fan is now working in the Lair. Much to the despair of , but and are quite amused.

What"s the point in sending E mailes if he doesn:t answer back

from Top Gear magazine...

A 20-car pile up ensued in Arkansas City when a woman, believing she was experiencing 'The Rapture' screamed "Jesus is back" and leapt cheerily from her movign car's sun roof. The woman, a Christian, had thought that 12 blow-up sex dolls, filled with helium, which had floated over the highway ahead of her, were fellow humans, rising to heaven.

<<>> oh joy. Please send her over here.

*Avoids references to Tour de France, lycra etc*

I washed all my bedding today, using a teeny-weeny little machine, it uses just 7 litres of water; very carbon friendly: basically, it's a bucket which spins round. You have to empty it & rinse it by hand, which is hard work, but the thing only cost 25 euros 2nd hand & previously i spent 30 per month at the launderette (including i admit whilst hanging around)

I really don't know what to say about inflated jesuses. I shall return to the nightmare thread i think.

zdt

Glad you are ok roy boy Sorry not been around much lately but lurked occasionally to see my favourite guys were ok.(Hug for 2legs too)
Your own place..what a joy..once you get sorted you will love having your own space.Pity I didn't live nearer as I have loads of spare pans etc from Nessie being at uni.

Have you got a potato masher yet then? or the patented rat skin removing device?

Clearly the implement you need most is a melon baller. Once you have melon balls, all else follows.

RF

Eeh! I've got one of those! Still, as I like my melon in gondola shaped slices, you will find that the implement is an absolute dream at getting Garne*'s original pickled onions out of the jar

I thought it was quite well established that I'm not really into melons. Actually, there aren't many fruits I am into. I'm partial to a plum tomato with my sausages though.

There ya' go, one 'Ooh matron' per sentence!

I do hope you remove the belly button things from your plum tomatoes first.

zdt