h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hello To You All
I feel like I have plastered this message in so many areas of H2G2 that you have all probably seen it by now, but in case you haven't it goes something like this...
I am an aspiring author. I have had stories published by the British Fantasy Society, had a booklet of my work put out by the same, and been included in Best New Horror 3. However, I am currently working on a dark comedy novel about serial killers, digital actors and Feng Shui burglars, so I need some other authors to chat with. To look at each others work, to provide pointers and to help ourselves through the night. Anyone interested please leave a message at my page here or e-mail me at [email protected]
Speak soon
The Doctor

How do Feng Shui burglers work? Do they rearrange what's left of your possessions after they have taken all the good stuff?

elico

Actually, though this will spoil the joke, they leave a detailed analysis of where you went wrong with placing your household items as justification for having robbed you. They are, of course, simply the instruments of higher Chinese wisdom...
Yours
The Doctor

Perhaps instead they should steal only the things neccessary for perfectly aligning your feng shui. They are New Age vigilantes, wandering the Earth to better the world's Energy Flow, and only taking those insignificant, Energy Blocking items they need to continue their quest.

Editorial Note: This conversation has been moved from 'The h2g2 Writing Workshop' to 'Ask the h2g2 Community'.