h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I've decided I'm going to open a medical clinic.

When anyone comes to me, whatever the complaint, I'll simply dose them full of mulled wine.

The notion came to me today when I discovered it is much more effective than Lemsip.

Do you plan to make the wine yourself or buy it from someone else?

Every time I see the subject line of this conversation on my postings page, the first thing that comes to mind is "Oops". Anyone who used to listen to Radio 1 of a Saturday morning will know why.

Buying it sounds easier.

I won't give them any of the herbal tea I made last night as a cold remedy, though. Either it, or the cold itself, made the world seem very trippy indeed. Everything seemed a bit off kilter.

You could try getting the recipe for that Pemberton's French Wine Coca...it was a big hit with the crowned heads back in the day...of course, Interpol might get on your trail...

Is an off kilter someone you might meet in a bodega in Glasgow?

That Pemberton's stuff, Wikipedia tells me, was sold as "a most wonderful invigorator of sexual organs".

I'm not sure I want that until I'm over this cold.

Well, Victoria and Albert produced nine heirs for the throne. Their reproductive prowess was hardly shabby!

Wikipedia? WIKIPEDIA? I am mortally offended: A87789992.

Ah, so you should be. Even though you're a pacifist I'll let you slap me for that. Yours is better, of course!

Your Entry actually made me want to try a glass.

I'll bet if I went to Corsica, to Mariani's village, I could buy a glass of the real thing if I knocked on the back door of the right farmhouse. (Corsica's a civilised place that way, I think - like Tennessee and Tipperary).

I'll bet you could if you knew the password.

What's Corsican for 'Joe sent me'?

I don't know about "Joe sent me", but these phrases might be useful!

"Ùn aghju fattu nunda di male. Hè un sbagliu. Induva mi purteti? So in statu d'arristazione?"

(I haven't done anything wrong. It was a misunderstanding. Where are you taking me? Am I under arrest?)

I always love the things that phrasebooks assume you'll need to know!

If that's for Corsica, I would say they were spot on.

I think I might learn the phrase "it was a misunderstanding" in as many languages as possible. It seems like the kind of thing that could come in handy in quite a few different situations.

Oh, so true. I was ever-grateful for the modern Greek textbook my friend Petros recommended to us before we moved there. It had a very realistic approach to modern Greek - which means the dialogues were surreal.

I didn't know why I needed the phrase 'o kosmos phonazi' - the crowd roars - until we lived within shouting distance of a stadium in Athens. We could tell every goal, of course...

Apropos of this wisdom, are you acquainted with James Thurber's classic essay, 'No Place Like Home'? The tale takes place in 1937, and rings so true today...

http://thedwm.com/theres-no-place-like-home-by-james-thurber/

Oh, warning: don't read that at work or on the bus. You'll disturb everybody by chortling.

I fear I am too rattled to leave home after reading that!

Sounds exactly right.

Although one of the latest phrases I had to translate from the online Spanish course was "It is a good lion, but I cannot keep it." Very useful

And my suitcase went astray on the return to the UK, full of all the family's Christmas presents. Luckily, it did arrive here eventually. I think it might have had more fun than me, going via Dublin.

Mulled wine - the one thing I've not yet drunk this season. It's going on my today's list.

Cheers everyone!

I made mulled cider for a Halloween party. I haven't made mulled wine, though.

I may well make some mulled wine later on. As there's only the two of us, I cheat and just bung two mugs of into the microwave, add some bits of lemon and some spices and some honey (maybe a shot of brandy) and take it out on to the street when we go out there at midnight to toast the New Year in with the neighbours.

I got some things like teabags, full of spices like cloves, cinnamon, etc. They work pretty well, and they're certainly plenty aromatic. You just use them as if you're making tea.

A shot of spirits is nice in it too - brandy/whisky/rum/vodka or whatever is available. It gives it a bit of a kick and just makes it extra warming.