h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

wales unite...assemble even...overthrow the oppressors...we can find a way of co-existing.

baa baa baa

Are you depressed Marvin?

I don't think a person necessarily has to be depressed to want to make sheep noises.

Actually, I get depressed whenever I'm in a situation where I CAN'T make sheep noises. It's like needing to smoke. I think.

I'm the same way with licking noses.

Next time I'm standing outside the office in the rain, quietly bleating to
myself and coughing other peoples smoke, I'll think of you licking your
nose and reflect.

not MY nose. licking other peoples noses.

Now that is cool. That is SO unfathomably cool. But a bit horrid. Do you lick the inside or
outside of other peoples noses?

Whichever takes my fancy.

I only looked at this thread as it was on the busiest list, and I was hoping to put in a New Zealander and sheep joke, but I see that this thread has digressed into a competition about who can pick their nose with their tongue.

I think it is grossly unfair to pick on New Zealanders in this fashion. You are correct, the discussion has digressed. All the best sheep jokes are about Australians anyway

Well if you're a NZer yeah then all the jokes about Aussies and sheep, but if you're an Aussie the jokes about NZers and sheep. I just can't wait until New Zealand officially becomes a state of Australia.

This discussion originated from a rather whimsical observation on sheep: "clouds on legs".
Those from the antipodes know better.
Ya shear 'em, ya eat 'em, ya don't have to luv 'em (unless you are very lonely)

Of course you have to love 'em. They have a saying somewhere, "He that knoweth
no love for his tup knoweth no love for life". Love your sheep, and the sheep will love
you. And by God, it's better when they co-operate.

Which do you prefer? And do you introduce yourself first?

My first close contact was while staying on a girlfriend's parents farm, a 1000 acre sheep farm in the lower Waikato.
I was helping out with the shearing, and on the last day they offered me the handpiece and 1 rather small "cloud on legs". It took me 15 minutes to wrestle the little bugger to the floor, and a further 25 minutes to strip HIM of most - all right - some of his wool. They had given me their stroppiest romney ram.
Therefore I must agree, it is much better if they will cooperate.

That's the great thing about Shetland sheep. Leave them
long enough, and the fleece just comes off by itself.
It's Nature's way of saying, "Hey look, you're a decent
kind of a sheep, you haven't been screwed around much by
man, why don't I do you a favour and prevent you from
dying unless someone comes to grapple you to the floor,
stick you between his/her legs and cut all your fleece
off..."

Ah, now I know in Oz they have been toying around with the idea of giving the sheep an injection. A few days later the fleece just comes off. However the sheep have to wear a net or something.

Glenikins: I must ask you what you understand by the word "tup". I read your elegently quoted piece as refering to food(?), but now I recall the process of making little sheep using a couple of larger sheep is called "tupping". From this am I correct in assuming this is the gist of the quotation. Scary stuff.