h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

on sunday I'm going to this book thing and there are gonna be loads of authors there, including Martine McCutcheon! Yeah, her music's bad and all but she used to be in Eastenders and is really famous! I've only got 3 autographs so far . Neil Morrisey, Natasha Little and the director of photography for Murder in Mind cos it was filmed at my bookshop once which was cool. Neil Morrisey was really nice and sooooooooo tall! But I'm a bit sad cos I don't think I can meet Alasdair . I might have to wait till Summer till I can meet him which is total s**t. I NEED TO MEET HIM NOW! Life is b****cks. But anyway, just thought I'd say I'm meeting some authors on sunday. It'd be nice if more than one person replied for once cos theres no point in being friends with some of you if you don't talk to me.

yes'm.


just need 1 more now and you'll have more than 1...

even more depressed cos I've fallen out with one of my mates, no one's emailing me, I can't go to a sleepover at one of my really good mates house, Badock didn't win anyting in house entertainment even though our dance was blatently better than Burke's they just hate Badock cos we're crap but its not our fault. No one's being sympathetic so I may as way just b****r off back to NR if they actually give a s**t about me. No one does. I hate my life. Hmm, I wonder where the nearest cliff is... Nah, too painful. Anyone got any PAINLESS ways of suicide?

No! Don't!

*backs out quietly...*

I'm less depressed now. It's half term and I've got no hoework for 9 days. I'm happy about that. And listening to Riot Zone helped. Chocolate used to be my antidepressant but I don't have any right now but DHR helps.

Oi, Wonko, where are you going?!

Wonko, come back please, I promise we'll involve you in thread.

Why not get some more chocolate?

I've eaten 2 bars today. I love Fuses. Orchestra was cool. Well, the playing was boring but Abby was there (she hasn't been there for 2 weeks and she's my best mate) and she said that she got a boyfriend and I said that I had too and she was like 'OMG, really?!' I'd tried to tell her ages ago but she wouldn't listen but she was suddenly really interested and wanted to know everything. BUt I didn't say I met you over the internet. She asked what you looked like and I had my Riot Zone CD with me and cos you said you had blondish hair I said you looked a bit like Patric C and showed her a pic. Sorry about that but it's hard to explain if I don't know what you look like properly so I just sort of made it up. . BUt anyway, we just started talking about boys and then break was over (we only get 30 mins ) so we had to stop talking. After break there was only 1 hr 15 mins but it felt like 3 hrs it was so boring. OK, this message is way too long. I'll post this now.

oh sry... something odd went through my mind... nm...



*shakes himself back to consciousness*

I've had lots of chocolate cake recently... good for energy if nothing else.

I love chocolate cake... but I don't like it light. It has to be really heavy and chocolatey...

if it's too chocolatey i have...... problems...

what's wrong with it being too chocolatey?

can't say...


but it has to be really really chocolatey...

Do you just go totally skitzo or what? I don't get high on anything. Shame really. Maybe I could make more friends if I got high on stuff... Once I got drunk which was quite fun, but it was at home so none of my mates saw.

What went through your head Wonko?

Wonko? Heloooooooooo, Wonko? You always do this! Someone leaves you a message and you don't reply! Meh! Evil person.

Alasdair, my mate Marise's (Horsegal) space is http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/classic/U518557.

Yeah, I said hi to her.

I forgot.


it got swamped in backlog, sorry...


I don't need stuff to get high on... just rain. I dunno why, maybe the low air pressure...

*Wonko floats into space*

*looks down confused*

*it suddenly hits him*


weeeeeeeeeeee!!