h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Ah, but it was the thinking that matters!

Seem to have got a new female friend this year, and it's nice not to have to worry about all that man & women stuff, well not with each other anyway. Been years since I had such a friend, and after my last "girlfriend", to have just a mate is no bad thing.

Oh yes, perfectly possible! I have had several, one for ten years, and the others for less time, but they re all working perfectly.




Vicky

Blicky, I think you're right that it's pretty inevitable that to some extent you'll assess the other person in terms of sex appeal. But then it's quite reasonable to like someone & want to sustain a friendship but not fancy sleeping with them.

Difficult to be sure how the other person feels about you ...

I think so yes,yes it is possible.

Are Platonic Relationships Possible?

Not only possible, but necessary. Who else are you going to get wallpaper your son's bedroom?

I have no male friends, as they are totally boring and utterly predictable in their choice of pub conversation.....i.e "Phwoaarr, look at the jugs on her"

Having said that, my "Sisterhood" has occasionally stepped over the mark and ended up in full on innapropriate behavior - even when their partners and children were upstairs at the time.

Bottom line? We are animals. Our base reactions are therefore pretty predictable i.e - if a sexually attractive female offers something more than a decaff coffee, then it is the height of rudeness to turn it down..........

Why deny nature?

<> (How)

To be fair I think this question also should include homosexuals with the same sexual attraction. In any case, I think SoRB summed it up best in post 3 when he said:

<>

Which brings me to repeat blicky's question and ask How what was meant by "without the introduction of the sexual element". Did you mean without the acknowledgement of the sexual element or without acting on a sexual attraction?

The usual definition of platonic is:
platonic: (usually lowercase) purely spiritual; free from sensual desire, esp. in a relationship between two persons of the opposite sex.

Speaking as a female heterosexual I have a few male friends with whom I've never felt any sexual desire. And also some with whom I have felt a sexual attraction (which varies depending on the person) but haven't acted on it. In both cases the relationships have remained 'platonic' in the sense that nothing overtly sexual has ever happened between us, but in the latter case there was definitely a bit of flirting and even a mutual acknowledgement that the attraction was there.

I think it's quite natural to respond somewhat sexually (ie. flirt a little) with those of whatever gender we feel sexually attracted to, even if it's the supermarket cashier, bank manager or local bartender.

And so, when it comes to friendships, I think this would also be there to some extent. Which isn't a problem in itself.

When I was younger (in my twenties) I had a lot more male friends than female ones - I just felt I related better and was more comfortable with them. I think mostly because there was no 'competition' involved, which is something I always found tiresome when dealing with other women. At that time. But after I turned 40 I found I had more female close friends than male ones. I think now (at age 50) it's kind of 50/50. Though again, I'm mostly talking about people my own age or close to it. So perhaps it's a question of maturity and people being more comfortable and secure in general with their sexuality?

az

"Can two heterosexual human beings of opposite genders interact in close or with frequent interaction without the introduction of the sexual element? "

Give us a kiss and I'll tell you.

Surely, as well as maybe being a tease, flirting can be at least partly a way of defusing things, or acknowledging that there's at least potential [mutual?] attraction there in theory, but that nothing actually has to be done about it.
Flirting can say "You're among the people I might get off with in a parallel universe, or in the absence of external obstacles (existing ties, social pressures, etc)".

As a friend of mine said "Flirting does and doesn't mean anything".

I think that's the point - I had a female friend for years and sex never really raised it head between us. Some damp shoulders for each other, a couple of very meaningful kisses at times, and lots of flirting, but sex was never in it.

Then one day we were walking back from a party hand in hand, and suddenly we were tearing each others clothes off - it happened a few times thereafter, and we remained friends until she moved away and got married.

That doesn't sound exceedingly platonic.