h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

This pennying business (new to me, and my feathers have almost turned black with age), is about getting drunk.

Drinking, in a scholastic sense, is only properly undertaken in the setting of a symposium, or after rigorous sexual or sporting activity. On any other occasion, it is to be viewed with the utmost rigour, and spied upon, but only in secret.

Talking of non-existent Caius traditions, I have heard that an old pal of mine was slung out on 'is ear the other day, and not even via the gate of personation.

How humilitating

Toodlepip!

Any sensible questions to an old hand.

May I add to my earlier drivel (I have just finished watching a televisual representation of the life of John Osbourne (or however it's spelled...)) He started to drink quite heavily as his life improved; indeed he began to resemble John Lennon it would seem (as in the Fat Beatle phase). Good living, but a bad press can ruin a writer, as long as they don't like vapidity too much. Otherwise, you're safe. Are there any Caius writers? Please help me out - I'm dying for boredom. Sorry, of boredom.

Here is a real Caius tradition: don't just head for any port in the storm; head for Caius port.

aaah! caius port! can't imagine that it was any better in your day that it is now- but at £8.75 a bottle it is least cheap, and it does get smoother the more you drink. i remember, just, a session with two 2nd year lawyers (both legendary "amateur" drinkers, in that they are non-squires) in which three bottles of the stuff were consumed between the three of us, and after the second bottle the port was going down very smoothly.

i ahve heard of this "late night bar" of which you have spoken, but know little. tell me more so that i can envy the "good old days".
according to an article in either TCS or varsity the cambridge council is appealing to have the unique licensing laws which cambridge uni enjoys revoked (at the moment any college can sell alcohol anywhere on its property at any time) and require butteries to obtain a pub-style license. so the days of college bars and frequent clare/queens' ents may be no more.

the LNB, ah yes...

To the sober, a dark, dingy cellar selling cr*p beer

To the drunk however, a mecca

Or so I have been told, for I only have vague recollections for some strange reason...

Just round the corner in St Mike's (K staircase I believe) was a bar where, if you buy the legends told, most of the top bands had their first gigs, Pink Floyd was a tale oft mentioned

It was at least, somewhere to escape to, with sustenance (or at least a gardi's cheeseburger) close at hand

In all seriousness, a dodgy, cheap late bar, (literally a Late Night Bar), run by students with a blind eye from the college.

From my last visit at the end of September, now a storeroom, although the guy running the buttery bar (when it is open) reckons he could make a killing re-opening the LNB

No need for pennying, queen's drowning or any other silly drinking games once you got there since you had to be too far gone to appreciate the ambience anyway!

"pennying, queen's drowning or any other silly drinking games" by that point you'd be hard pressed to remember the rules anyway (even the simple rules such as 'there's money in it, so drink it')

There are rules? Why did nobody ever tell me!

Now it all makes sense!

The rules do tend to get altered on the spot by whoever can sound most convincing, in an attempt to get you even more drunk.

which is why us freshers always get slaughtered playing the games in the first few weeks, before we realise the somewhat variable nature to the rules.

I agree. Maybe something to warn new freshers about? But by that point, we would be the second years making up rules to increase their drunkenness.

I see that evryone is now in full possession of their Faulty I mean faculties; so on with the game:

One rule I recall involved the substitution of a spirit commonly served at the buttery bar, for some pure alcohol (or was it the other way round. The result - either blind drunkenness, or a suddenly blind drunk (whichever) was the deemed a grand succéss d'éstime and the victim or vanquisher (however you care to look at it) was deemed {or was it redeemed).
Any blind & drunk were some of the pointed signs that this way and that. Or was their only just one sign, and it looked as if there two o i dunno it was all so so long or ago (or was it last week?)

Tata!

Blimey(sic) I seem to be replying to myself here - what on earth is going on? Are there two of me?

Yes. At least. Possibly three.

Thanks for you're reaasurance - may I offer you any advice. For instance, Mr Prynne is probably the only sane memeber of the college (apart from yourself obviously). You don't mind the spelling, I hope; it's my own invention. [blush!]

well... i'm back in harvey court now. to find my ceiling has, according to my bedder, been leaking over christmas and has had to be patched up by the maintenance staff. ( a botched job involving replastering and painting the affected section of ceiling- rather than doing any real repair work).

note to catwoman: not sure if your ceiling is also affected- but most of the rooms in our corridor are.

Uh-oh. I'm back tomorrow. This would be because part of our ceilings have balconies on top, yes? Most of the rooms in whole corridor? You sure it's not just your half? (I doubt it, there's trees near me, but I can hope)

the whole corridor. pru's ceiling is one of the worst affected.

I cei u r awl deliaing with the mostbimportant matters in hand (i.e. your fragile, thin-skinned skins [don' t get them wet or old otherwis u may not get gud enuff grades to qualify for arsedum.
Not impressed.

Drinking dodgy liquids is all right, but I'd rather not have them dripping out of my ceiling thankyou.

...but what when it droppeth like gentle dew from heaven knows where?