h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I haven't got a big nose!!!






Honest

Pinocchio </>

Oi!!! Get back here you!

Yes dear??

picks up red bowler hat...
Vicki darling, what a big nose do you have?

mumbles: you know the rest...

to quote from the great Python's Life of Brian, "Oi, big nose!"

hands Vicki bunch of tulips with tomoto dripping off it.

Oh, TB...I've lost your e-mail addy...you know what to do


*takes flowers from pheloxi and wipes off the tomato*

Shouldn't worry dear, someone is trying to start a rumour about me that my health problems are made-up, that I self-diagnose myself with whatever is fashionable at the moment.

People can be can't they?

Kaz! She has got a big nose, read my journal!!

Hi Kaz!!!

How've you been?

Fine VV. My husband has a big nose, I call him 'big nose' all the time. He pretends to get upset but can't stop laughing. I shall read your journal Lil!

Just read it, that is indeed proof that VV has a big nose. Now I have 2 people I can call big nose!!

The ironic thing is...my nose is an ickul nose...honest

doesn't look like a big nose to me

actualy this realy about relativity of objects:

if the nose is big and helmet small.
...you still have big nose, but looks relative even bigger.

if the nose is big and helmet big.
...you still have big nose.

if the nose is small and helmet big.
...you still have small nose, but looks relative even smaller.

if the nose is small and helmet small.
...you still have small nose.

conclusion:
* your nose is only big / small if you are not influenced by frriends and media.
* check your glasses.
* may be exentension is need.
* be patient.
* wish for peace.

oh sorry the last 2 are just thier ease my mind. I do not have a big nose.

correction

actualy this realy about relativity of objects:

should be

actualy this realy about relativity of objects in a person's mind:

Hey VV will future hubby be able to kiss you at the end of your wedding, or will your humungous konk get in the way?

Tain't big, I know thatI've seen it, but I might still take the mickey now and again, just for the "concushion"