h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hi.

Hi there. Can you still see me?

I think perhaps...

Is school still going well?

Well, it's not going horribly, so I suppose it's still going well enough.

Every once in a while, I still get nightmares of my college days. You know the one where you've skipped so many classes that they come back and revoke your degree...

No, but I know the one where there's a mouse loose in Winn-Dixie that your lab class is assigned to catch, and somebody gets the clever idea to put it in a Ziploc bag and leave it in the donut case so they can bring the others to it instead of having to hold a mouse...

Ah, mine must be a graduate-level dream then?

I never took a lab science that required living animals - only the fossilized kind.

Neither have I. I used to do dead animals in grade school but nowadays I'm restricted to pressure areas and what have you. But it's because I am not science.

In other news, though, the evening entertainment for the past week (since vacation ended) has been listening to my awful roommate fighting on the phone with her awful non-boyfriend all night, which she hasn't done since the beginning of last semester.

I don't like entertainment that keeps me up at night when I have early morning classes, though. Personally.

I wish I were a freshman again! Freshmen don't need to sleep and their roommates aren't pretentious seniors with no social skills or concept of hygiene.

But to make up for it all, someone made me shishkabobs tonight.

Who needs awful television dramas when you've got an awful college roomate/drama queen?

Nice one on the bobkashish - when I was in school I ate *far* too much cafeteria food.

*shudder*

Cafeteria food is too expensive, and you get a choice three times a day: Soggy Chik-fil-A, soggy Pizza Hut or soggy Burger King.

It's funny how it takes less time to make something than it does to wait in line for it, too. Heh.

Brand names?

At my school it was soggy generic pizza, rubber generic chicken or burnt and ugly generic burgers.

But it *was* cheap and all-you-can stomach.

Yeah, brand name. Everything's commercial in the heart of Tallahassee.

What a great tag line for a marketing campaign!

"I wish I were a freshman again! Freshmen don't need to sleep and their roommates aren't pretentious seniors with no social skills or concept of hygiene."

No, they're pretentious freshmen with no social skills or concept of hygiene. I went through two room-mates my freshman year. The first one was twice as tall as me but insisted on sleeping on the bottom bunk (so I had to kind of jump off my bed every morning and either stub my toes or land on the can of Mountain Dew that he kept by his bed because he couldn't get up until he drank some every morning).

Plus he was deaf in one ear and always slept on his good ear, so when his alarm clock went off at 7 AM on the days that I didn't have to get up until 10 I had to turn it off about three times until he would invariably tell me that he was skipping class that day. He snored like thunder and whenever I left for the weekend he would trash the place and let his friends sleep on my blankets. And he was the GOOD room-mate. I don't even want to talk about the other-one.

I've lived off campus for the past year and a half and it's so much nicer. OK so the toilet backs up every other week and the ceiling always threatens to cave in, but at least I don't have to worry about roving gangs of anti-vegetarians decorating my door with ham cold-cuts like I did in the dorms.

Soooooo..... Anyway, what's up KM? Jimi X? I haven't talked to any of you guys for quite a while, have I? What have I been missing out on? Any dead monkey sightings lately?

-Zarquon