h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: The Ballpoint Pen - A948549
Author: Archangel Fashion Cat (Bring your Abbreviations to A975666) - U137089

Comments gratefully received!

I think this could do with a few headings.

Have added a few headings, but not sure if it needs some more. What do you think Gnomon?

Good entry - just a quick query - when you say "$100,000 worth of ballpoint pens was sold, primarily due to the introduction of the new technology", do you mean they sold so many because the new technology of the ballpoint pen generated so much interest, or are you referring to another un-named technological development that enabled them to sell loads of pens?

Actually, thinking about it, shouldn't it be "$100,000 worth of pens WERE sold"?

Cheers,
Number Six (Sub-editor and pedant)

yep. it should be were! ANd I've changed it to say this new technology.

yep. it should be were! ANd I've changed it to say this new technology.

There. You got it in stereo

Unless I'm being thick (which is actually quite probable) you havn't mentioned "space pens" I also find the last parapraph of two needs some work as it loses "oomph" and gets a bit "boggy" and dosn't seem to end nicely.

That said its a nice artical and not too long well done!

Hi Fashion Cat! I'm glad to see you put a few headings in. It still looks very fragmented, though. I suggest the following: add one more heading - "The cheap disposable vs the luxury writing implement". Then start moving some of your paragraphs around so that they all belong to the sections they are in. If necessary you can disturb the strict chronology to develop the entry along the lines of the Bic, the Parker, the battle for dominance etc.

Back_Ache, I've done a seperate article on the Space Pen, which is also in PR at the moment. As such, I've kept it of here.

Will shift paras around to lump them together then.

A very good article. One point which might be interesting (puts on white labcoat):
Ballpoint pens use an ink which contains a large proportion of thiodiglycol (HOCH2CH2SCH2CH2OH). Thiodiglycol and hydrochloric acid make mustard gas. Should we therefore get the arms inspectors to check on the number of ballpoint pens that Iraq ordered? Or is Saddam stealing them so he can make WMD's (that would explain a lot)?

Oh my god how did my Biochemical graduate fiancee miss that interesting fact.

Ah! so thats how come the US know that they are going to have lots of nasty things.. they count the number of pens they order!

But how many are there in teh Whitehouse and Pentagon.

I think you're more likely to find crayons in the White House.

oh. fantastic!

Dubya is just colouring-in the invasion plan as we speak. It's his third attempt and he's only just managed to colour inside the lines.

Resolution 1441: 'The Rissolution is...that we all sign it and take it to Christopher Robin' (A.A. Milne)

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