Robyn Hoodie, The Virgin Diary - Chapter 25: Judgement Day - The Longest Day

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Chapter 25: Judgement Day - The Longest Day

Repent! The Day of Judgement has arrived!



OK, that may sound a tiny bit too dramatic. I haven't even figured out how to pent, let alone repent. What I mean is: Today one of our teachers is going to give us a phone call to tell us whether we graduated outright or have to redo an exam. (Or at the very worst case, have failed so miserably that there is no possibility whatsoever to recover and we have to redo the whole of the last year).


During our late breakfast, Robyn and I concluded that we have both put the number of our landline on the calling list for this. We should have tried to avoid that, because now we don't know who is going to pick it up once it rings for the first time. Or worse, Our teachers try to call simultaneously and fail to contact us.


If I remember correctly, they will call between 1 and 3 PM, so we have the whole morning to work up to some serious fretting and pacing through the kitchen and living room. (this will annoy our parents, but they chose to have offspring in the first place, so they shouldn't be moaning about that.


Due to the events that took place during the History exam, I know that I will have to redo that anyway, but it is still nice to know if it remains at just that one. They haven't told us when the re-test will be if you fail that one, though. Better not speculate.


Speculating anyway, due to lack of anything other to do.


RIIIIIIINNGG!!!!


'You take it Sis!'


'Why me?'


RIIIIIIINNGG!!!!


'Ok then... Hi Grandma... No, we haven't heard anything yet. We will not for at least the next two hours. Please don't call us. We will call you'


She put down the receiver, sighing 'That's another year of my life gone...' then dropping on the sofa with her smartphone and back into bored mode.


A loud train horn reminded me that I changed my message notification sound into a loud train horn just yesterday. It went on for quite some time, teaching me that notification sounds can't be stopped once triggered. Robyn grinned and started typing, causing a train horn fanfare until I managed to change the notification sound to a single short reverberating arrow sound. Looking at what she actually sent, I found a video link. This yielded a shorth burst of 'Lord of the Rings'. To be more specific, it was the bit with Gandalf bellowing 'YOU SHALL NOT PAAAAASSSSS!!!' to the Balrog of Morgoth. Thanks for the vote of confidence, Sis...


RIIIIIIINNGG!!!!


OK. if we take it in turns, this one's mine...


'Yaaaassss??? Who's calling at this untimely hour?' (Apparently nerves do something to my dramatic skills). 'No! We are not at this point in time interested in a treatise on the merits of your over-expensive triple glazing! You do know what day it is, do you?'


It is a lucky thing we have such an antiquated telephone apparatus (the fact that it still operates is proof of a robust design), because the force with which I threw the receiver back on would have probably shattered a more modern one. Another drawback of smartphones... The only way to relieve your anger is to repeatedly hit it on the edge of the table, leading to massive repair bills.


One PM has passed 65 minutes ago, but Robyn seems strangely calm. I ask her why this is.


'I didn't want to spoil the fun for you, but they are actually going to call us between three and four PM.'


'So I could have been sleeping for hours instead of sitting here, fretting...?!'


'That is correct.' She grinned at me triumphantly. If looks could kill, Robyn would now be a smoking patch of grease on the kitchen wall. Luck for me they can't. The living room wall would have been even worse though. Tiles are so much easier to clean.


Well, at least that gives me time to go to the lavatory.


RIIIIIIINNGG!!!!


'Excrements! why now? Robyyyyn! You pick that one up! I am momentarily unavailable!'


RIIIIIIINNGG!!!!

'Do you know anyone with the +234 country code?'


RIIIIIIINNGG!!!!

'No, I don't. Isn't that the Nigerian Prince scammer?'


RIIIIIIINNGG!!!!

'Don't know. Could be. Shall I pick up and ask them?'


'Why don't you just disconnect it to free the line for more important calls?'


'Aaahhh, Peace and quiet. Finally.'


RIIIIIIINNGG!!!!


'I should hurry, if I were you, it is your turn. Don't forget to wash your hands!'


'Yes, hello?'


'Is this Robyn speaking?'


'Unless Robyn changed gender in the last few hours, it seems clear to me that you are speaking with her brother, Miss... I'll hand her the phone. But please hurry, because I am expecting an important phone call, too.'


Judging from facial expressions, my sister managed to pass her exams... These congratulations do take a lot of precious time. Doesn't that teacher have more calls to make? Put it down, Sis.... Finally...


Now I wait.


And I wait some more.


One minute to four. (that rhymes, but I would prefer if they called me instead)


RIIIIIIINNGG!!!!


'Hello Grandma... yes, Robyn passed, but can you pleeeeaaase get off the line, right now!'

RIIIIIIINNGG!!!!


'You'd better be my teacher or I will have a nervous breakdown!!! Oh, you are... So I have achieved the bare minimum to pass every subject, with History still pending? I have reached the ultimate zero points margin without failing (so far)? Thank you Mr. You couldn't reach me before? I know. Can I now go and hit something repeatedly? Oh, I have to be at school in half an hour to pick up the list with my grades. All right... See you then. I'll save the hitting things for later, then.'

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