Robyn Hoodie, the Virgin Diaries - Chapter 22: Double Bankruptcy
Created | Updated Jun 8, 2024
Chapter 22: Double Bankruptcy
With my new insights into the merits of doing unskilled labour for the rest of my life, I have decided that working towards a degree might be the smart thing to do after all. That also means passing my exams first.
Just this morning, Robyn decided that it was a good idea to make a 'HOW MANY DAYS LEFT TILL EXAMS?!!!' countdown on the kitchen whiteboard. That was kind of a confrontational action, because the number was rather lower than my previous perception, being into the single digit numbers now... A quick check in our online planning tool raised my adrenalin level even more, because Robyn's first exam was a day later than mine, due to a different curriculum. Time for rigorous action! I might even have to mount an expedition to find my school textbooks and make some summaries, if I can't get Robyn to hand over the ones she made on our shared subjects. Last time I saw those books was before I 'cleaned up' my room in Chapter 0 of this diary.
To streamline the recovery process plan, I went to the budget crap store around the corner to get myself a personal disposable whiteboard and some markers. Since I was there already, I couldn't help also buying 500 assorted cable-ties, a clip-on zoom lens for my smartphone, a solar-powered night light, some candybars with possibly Turkish writing on the package and a glow-in-the-dark wired gaming mouse, effectively spending the money I earned yesterday, even before it had actually managed to reach my bank account. With my newly acquired treasures, I sneaked up to my room.
Taking care not to step into anything sharp, squishy or sticky, I managed to reach my desk and dropped everything on the sole empty spot in the middle. Sitting on my well-worn office chair, I mounted the zoom lens on my smartphone to explore the further corners of my room from a relatively safe location. On the second attempt, after turning off the cat filter, I managed to locate my history textbook. Unfortunately that exam is one of the later ones, so the search continued. To better explore the darker corners, I charged the glow-in-the-dark functionality of my gaming mouse under the desk lamp and then threw it out into the chaos that is my room, reeling it in by the USB wire, which was way too long for normal use (explaining why it was so cheap in the first place), but perfect for this kind of application. Having managed to retrieve some more of my textbooks, including Maths, which would be the first exam (Yikes!), I looked at the mouse and wondered whether it would survive being put in the washer/dryer, as bits of unidentified but clearly organic goo were left sticking to it. Some previously insignificant bit of Economics theory popped up in my head, saying it was probably a financial total-loss situation. I'll have to write-off that one Euro sixty- nine in my financial records, once I get around to start recording this kind of stuff.
With the majority of my textbooks retrieved, I put up the whiteboard with some cable ties, to make a planning schedule. This in itself didn't take too much effort. There are only so many ways you can divide speed-learning seven subjects over the course of fourteen days. Chronological it is!
Looking at my desk, I used my outstretched arm to swipe all of its contents over the side and onto the floor, then placing my textbooks in chronological order, making sure they were evenly spaced and well aligned. On second thought, I picked up my new possessions from the floor and put them back on the desk.
Satisfied with a job well done I went on to scroll shorts videos on my phone, only stopping once realisation dawned that today was also included in my planning, as a full working day. (And we're back to Yikes! mode again).
I randomly opened my Maths book to stumble upon a treatise on how to find your X (or something) and Y? Being happy with my current relational status, I skipped a few pages. Matrix calculations... Seen most of that franchise... Skip! Probability calculations... Do I even make a chance pulling this off? Maybe I need expert tuition. Let's call in the Twins! They excel in everything.
My direct message bounced back immediately with a notification: 'Both Star and Portia are currently unavailable due to urgent curricular revision activities. For important matters we will get into contact with you after the exams are over. Anyway, you should be studying hard as well!'
OK, that only leaves one option open: I have to do the actual work all by myself. (Robyn already closely guarded her summary notes from me, when I came asking). What is the point of having a sister? I ask you.
Now I have to go and start at page one. No more sleep then, I guess.
