The h2g2 Post 03.07.17

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Posted: 3rd July 2017

Declaring Independence from Internet Monotony

A vision of holiday heaven.Yes, it's Independence Day weekend in the US, but we hasten to assure our readers that nothing in this Post issue is about 1776, the fireworks industry, or current politics. Instead, we do what most North Americans do the first weekend in July1. We celebrate the glories of summer in the northern hemisphere: the holidays, the natural beauty, breaks from the routine. . . what was your most memorable summer experience? This month's Create challenge invites you to share your stories and pictures. Maybe you didn't overthrow a government on your holiday, but we're sure something happened to you worth sharing. So search your memories and your photo files. You know where to send them.

To start you off, the Literary Corner features a rare travel brochure your Editor dug up during a foray through the internet archives. Back in 1908, these Chamber of Commerce members in Muskegon, Michigan (where?) were determined to sell the place as a holiday resort. The photos and text turned their brochure into an accidental masterpiece. Once again, you will be grateful to live in the 21st Century.

We also offer the following amazing highlights this Fourth of July week:

  • 24 Lies a Second by DoctorMO celebrates its 500th review this week! This is a banner event. Not only is it amazing for someone to have done anything on the internet 500 times, but to have produced 500 film reviews that are as witty and insightful as these is worthy of note. And although Awix was disappointed with this week's film, he mused, 'Fingers crossed #1000 will feature a better movie.' So congratulations, best wishes, and hearty thanks to Awix! Long may he explain cinema to us! Party on, dude!Ladies partying in a bath
  • The international gardening discussion goes into overdrive. This week, you will be astounded by the lilies in Mrs Hoggett's front yard. You will be flabbergasted by Yorkshire gardening techniques as demonstrated by the Prof. You didn't believe me about the flame thrower. Now we have documentary proof! Gaze and wonder. He's not called Prof Animal Chaos for nothing.
  • Do we have cats? Of course we have cats. It's the internet, after all. The difference between me and Willem is that Willem has a painting of a wild cat that he executed with his usual care and professionalism. He also has important information about this cat: its scientific name, its habitat, etc. Whereas I snapped a quick photo of a couple of kittens playing near the Amazon Prime delivery box, and slapped on some snark. Learn from Willem, add more snark to mine, and remember to send your captionable photos for future publication.
  • Bluebottle continues to torture your brains with another Isle of Wight language quiz. There are some interesting words here. Learn them, and try to work them into conversation around the water cooler. We dare you.
  • We quiz you about Pittsburgh spookiness and old armour. There are the usual feeble jokes here and there, you know how serious we are. The Editor wishes to thank Minorvogonpoet for providing the inspiration for this week's writing column.
  • And okay, I did sneak in one US history topic – but honestly, it only happens to be about Abe Lincoln. Check the Ninja Film Review.

And that's us this week. Get to work reading, commenting, and planning revenge. Next week will be here before you know it. At that time, we will have more quizzes, even dumber jokes, and a scary summer story that will have you looking under the bed at night, especially if you live near Liverpool. With all that to look forward to, have a great week! Go make some summer memories!

PSA raccoon raider at night. See that thing over there? It was celebrating the summer solstice by trying to raid the bird feeder under cover of darkness. The bird feeder proved more than a match for him, although the neighbours are complaining that he's managed to open even 'animal-proof' locked dustbins.

What is you, you say? Oh, it's a raccoon, the scourge of the North American backyard. They're bandits. Germans call them 'wash bears' because they wash their food. We call them many things, not all of which will get past the filther. See those stripes across his eyes? He wears a mask, does this guy, just like a comic-book burglar. It's appropriate: raccoons have tiny hands, and can open all sorts of things.


Dmitri Gheorgheni

CATS AND MORE CATS
  • Serval by Willem.
  • Kitten Buddies, by Dmitri Gheorgheni.

POP QUIZZES

EXTREME GARDENING

  • Red and Yellow Lily, by Dmitri Gheorgheni.
  • Flamethrower Gardening, by Prof Animal Chaos.

THINGS YOU MAY NOT HAVE KNOWN
(But Wanted To)
LAZY, HAZY – HA!
  • July 2017 Create Challenge by Freewayriding.
  • Fishermen with a big catch in 1908
FEEDBACK, SUBMISSIONS AND DISCUSSION


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1And a happy 150th birthday to Canadians! You're cleaner and politer than the US, your leader is much better looking...heck, even your flag is cool.

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