h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I have come up with

they are ginger, have a butterfly tattoo and will not eat a cephalopod under any circumstances

I know I am not your best student

*leaves *

Sounds intriguing? Male or female?

don't know yet,

not that is any clue to their gender

shoe size is 7ish

hmm, what is a step up from an

but not an opossum in a bag...

Sorry.

sorry Dmitri

I have gone a bit astray on my daydreamy references

I'm sure you have seen a opossum, a possum of some kind arise from a bush

and that your Mum dropped off one at the head teachers office as a ??

don't disillusion me now, that I have just made it all up

How about we just have a calming cup of perculiar

It is true about the possums.

I must have been thinking about the research I'm doing. I ran across a charming folktale about a possum and a jaguar.

There seems to be a ginger, Mayan person with a butterfly tattoo in a tartan thingy and comfortable boots

listening to a story about a possum and jaguar

they don't seem to be doing much detective stuff though

clearly going undercover at this point

That reminds me - Elektra and I made up a Bavarian detective once. I'll have to resurrect him. Friedl Wagner, Private Eye.

*gives a discreet nod to Private Eye Friedl, from the corner booth*

as discreet as you can be, being ginger Mayan in tartan with lovely boots

did you get chatted up at the bar

Right I have made progress, gender is female

So ginger, Mayan, female, butterfly tattoo, has tartan in her wardrobe, doesn't eat cephalopods and has size 7 feet,


I'm struggling with flaws

So am going to distract myself with random talents, or skills

She can shoe a horse and play piano or some such

what do ya reckon?

As ancient Mayans had neither horses nor pianos, I'm impressed.

Does she have filed teeth?

Who said she was ancient

a bit maybe

and no, no filed teeth, although her toes are well looked after and painted but you can't see that what with the boot and all...

Okay, this is your fault: A87813093

This is a bit of a classic hootoo thread. .

If the story is even more bonkers than this, then I won't be surprised. .

Back in a minute ...

(, been reading the story)

Brilliant! Some classic lines, love the noir style. Best to read it a few times, like any good script, to appreciate the intricacies and wit.

A tonic of a read. . A tonich from Munich.

And sooo 1979. Check those camera angles.



Standing between a man and his Semmelknödel is an offence against ancient Bavarian law.



The paternoster's an old lift. It runs continuously. Each compartment is about the size of a generous coffin, and open on one side. The fun consists in convincing the Schnickelfritz that when the paternoster car gets to the top of the building, it's going to turn upside down.

At this point, the Schnickelfritz will usually confess to having caused the Hindenburg disaster.



Classic lines. . They had me spluttering my drink.

All dressed for climbing an alp, I might add. This is certainly the most traditionally-dressed crime ring in history, I thought. They could win first prize at a folk festival.

I'm glad you liked that one, CC.

And I hope it inspires further defective detectives.

Marvellous Dmitri