h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

errr.... you have the word "admidiatly" was that a typo, (v. serious one) or have U just invented a new word? (ie... perhaps U meant immediately.)

yay, phoniex!
-Pete

me? erm mistake if it was
]thanx pete

yes...Ok....

woop

I've skipped the backlog, so sorry if some of this has been covered already.
Firstly, your use of the present tense is interesting. I've seen some stories in which the present tense really does give the story more immediacy, and add to the mood. It will probably be difficult to maintain, though, as the first instinct is to write in past tense. I could imagine getting a serious headache from being forced to concentrate on that while I'm writing.
If you spot spelling/grammar errors, I would correct them if I were you. You do have that ability, since it is you article. As mentioned above, the tense does slip a bit towards the end.
I'll post more, but I've got to go right now.

i cant remember the spellings and im not good at it but thanx ( i think)

I've never had much good with tenses. Just flow and there they are
it's great phoniex and I'm off to read the rest..

that was sposed to read 'either' in those statements..
The rest was ..getting more and more interesting..*fumbles about in anticipation*

hmm...story...hmmm....

hmm?

hmm indeed.

I'm sure I could take it away for a couple of minutes and proofread it. Then we get down to the interesting questions.
For instance, at the start, the narrative implies that we, as the reader and narrator, _arrive_ at the place in question, to find the character already there. This establishes these two as individual identities before the story begins. Is this deliberate?

i think from what i understand of that question yes im only 13

2 individual identities? You and the character?

Or the elf and the moose..
the character in the first posting being the elf..

what are you talking about?

whatever Just Bob said..

yeah ok...forget i exist...carry on...