h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: Joy Electric - The Band - A834121
Author: Jesso - U199746

This is a work of love dedicated to a great, but relatively unheard of, band. Be gentle.

Just one small warning here:
"True Harmony - One of the few JoyE songs at 200 BPM, it is s********** fast and the lyrics are excellent."
I believe that word is not allowed - try 'incredibly' or something.

Hiya Jesso.

Not a bad entry.

If I may humbly suggest a few suggestions:

The first couple of paragraphs are a bit free-form in style. They're sort of, you know, like you're being...um...spoken to by a real sort of person. This style tends to get frowned upon by the sub-editors, and may need to be a bit more formal. That said, don't become a history textbook - it's always nice to keep the original Researcher's style in the Entry.

Take out some of the hyperbole, all the question marks in the first subheader, for example. Use

write stuff here

...to link to Joy Electric's website, and don't advertise mp3's - I doubt whther that would go down very well at all with the BBC.

Take out the horizontal rule before the Discography. It's a bit pointless there.

The complete track-listing is certainly impressive, but it's a long, painful slog for anyone who just wants a bit of background on the band(person!). I've written a few entries on musicians for h2g2 now, and I find the best way is to give the album title, write a few notes about its style, and then pick out a few outstanding tracks (as with A737633 - shameless plug, I know). It seems like a shame to knock out some of this hard work - maybe you could split it, and do two entries on Joy Electric 1994-1998, and Joy Electric 1998-2002.

This sounds really critical, I know, but there is good material here, and with a bit of tweaking it should be in the Edited Guide.

Right - now you've got to go and Review A834266 in return.

B

Sorry, my example of the link tag didn't quite come out as planned.

It's all in A187229, if you need more info.

B

Is "s*****c" a not-nice word over there or something? It simply means "hyperactive" here in Texas.

And I will re-write those opening paragraphs soon, I just don't have the time at the moment.

Thanks so much for your input!

The word 'spastic' used to be used to describe people with cerebral palsy. But I notice the amount of times it gets used on American TV shows ('Summers, you drive like a spaz') shows that meaning has either never made it across the pond or else it died out fairly quickly.

Over here, of course, it's a general term of schoolyard abuse. Usually the class joker gets called a 'Spazzy' on a daily basis, which can be quite distressing to the child at the time.... my doctor says the long-term trauma might live on with me for the rest of my live.

Jims

I seem to recall Mark Moxon (remember him ) posting a list of words considered offensive, including y*d and s*****c. But it seems to me that s*****c would only be offensive (because it's now derogatory) if used to describe someone suffering from cerebral palsy or some other form of muscular spasm, so maybe the use of it here is fine. But if it could just be changed to 'manically' or 'incredibly' that should avoid any problems.

But I don't know why it's considered ok to be offensive to manics...

'S*****c' and 'spazz' were playground taunts when I was a schoolboy, and at one point we were all told in no uncertain terms by the deputy head that it wouldn't be tolerated because it demeaned those with a mental handicap. And some years later The Spastic Society changed its name to Scope, I believe because of the associations with the word 'spastic'.

Wowee. I didn't know that. I will change it, if I haven't already (I can't remember if I did or not...).

I think I am going to break it up into the main stuff and a discography, as two separate entries. Would that be allowed?

Alright, I tried to make the frist bit a little less chatty.

I also changed the "s-word", so now it is happy.

The End......... or is it?

The discography has now been moved to A837704

It's definitely better to read, now.

B

Oh, you mentioned about the MP3s... the band actually puts those up, so as to give people a taste of the music. It is fully approved-of by Ronnie, and there is even a link from the JoyE page to the mp3 page.

In a word, Ronnie's cool like that ^_~

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B