h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

It is plainly obvious to me that you must not have grown up in the south.
Having been in the northwest for a few years and though I would never leave, the thing I miss the most, is the food I grew up on in the south.
Grits being one of them.
I have only known people not having grown up on southern (true southern) food to put something sweet on their grits.
Unlike your description of grease as flavoring, the best is bacon --- bits, no fat, --- cheese, butter, green onions, and an array of so many other things.
I went to read your comments on grits, because I was feeling a little home-sick for that wonderful southern food I was blessed to have been brought up on, and yes, even the occasional "ya'll come back now" typical southern goodbye and invitation all rolled into one.
Anyway, I can only say It must have not been cooked properly or you have not eaten it, one, because it taste nothing like cream of wheat, and when cooked properly does not have the consistency of such.
To put something sweet on it, is like putting syrup on corn on the cob.
And I wish you one day have the luxury of a true and well time-honored tradition of southern cooking, Including 8 to 10 hour slow cooked roasts, 6 hour stews, with home-made roux, pecan pie, --- The most mouth-watering, juicy turkey and duck at thanksgiving, etc, etc .
It is an experience you will wish you had had long before, and if you are a vegetarian, We can satisfy there too.

The initial post on grits is - at best - a bit misleading.

You should know there are two types of grits - white and yellow - just like there is white corn and yellow corn. White grits have a milder flavor while yellow grits have a more pronounced corn taste.

Adding sugar or sweeteners [syrup, etc.] to grits isn't typical of southern American's nor with persons who are familiar with southern cuisine. Bacon bits and cheese are sometimes added, especially when the grits are cooked as a casserole and served as a side dish. While some add milk and butter to grits - along with salt and/or pepper - I prefer mine just slightly salted with butter.

Cooked correctly and served with appropriate condiments, grits are excellent.

As a Southerner, I second the emotions above.

Grits are important in the South because they kept an awful lot of people from starving to death. Pellagra, caused by the body's inability to absorb the nutrients in corn, was a big killer in the South after the War of Greater Northern Aggression. Soaking corn in lye water breaks down the corn proteins and allows the body to utilize them as fuel. The soaked corn is called hominy, and grits are made from ground hominy. Yellow grits contains ground corn as well as ground hominy.

Grits are closely related to polenta, and generally complement savoury items. It is unusual in the extreme for anyone who grew up with grits to put anything sweet on them.

While instant grits are convenient, they have approximately the same consistency as wallpaper paste, and are probably responsible for most peoples' aversion to grits.