Have you ever been to a big party where you did not know anyone and it was really hard to find something to talk about? Once you have asked, 'How do you know the host?' and 'Have you come far?' the subjects dry up, and you look around desperately for another drink.

It gets worse. When you've been the one giving the party, have you ever had people just hanging around in groups of two or three, talking about the new roadworks, or the Parent Teacher's Association, and having the exact same conversations they always have when they meet up by the supermarket shampoo display? So no one gets to meet or know anyone new, because they are all too intimidated by the numbers.

The 'Claim to Fame' game encourages people to talk to each other, and gives them something exciting, maybe even mildly scandalous, to talk about. (This also works well if you are running one of those business trainings or motivational workshops of a dozen or so people, where most of the people don't already know each other.)

And better than that - everyone is instantly interesting.

How to Play

It does take a bit of preparation - a lot of preparation, actually, but full instructions are provided. When your guests arrive, they pick up a card which has a Claim to Fame - a secret or a little-known fact about someone else at the party. They have to find that person. To encourage people to mix and talk to each other, you can put all the cards into a hat at the end of the game and have a draw, with a prize for the person who finds and the person who is found.

Getting the Secrets

Digging out Claims to Fame is hard. When you are telling people about the game, tell them about arriving at the party and picking up the cards before you tell them you need to know their Claim to Fame. If you ask them their secrets first, they will come over all shy on you.

Most people don't say,

Oh, I have so many stories - let me think which ones I am prepared to tell in public... I know! I once had lunch with Monica Lewinsky - will that do?

Most people have a tendency to say,

Oh, I have had a really dull life!

But dig a little, and you can always find something.

'Places you have been to' is a good place to start, and 'Famous people you have met' is another good one. Or 'The worst thing you ever did at school'. Or 'A sport you do now or have done in the past'. And once you have a few examples you can make suggestions. In the business workshop situation, you can include things like 'The most outrageous thing you have ever done at work', or make their Claim to Fame 'The thing you are most proud of professionally', or something to do with the theme of the workshop.

Spin the Wording - Vamp It Up

Example

Used to do parachute jumping

- sounds like it was nice for him, but it isn't that interesting. But:

Used to climb onto the wings of aeroplanes flying at 3000 feet and throw himself off them for fun

- sounds dare-devil, and makes you ask why he had to get out onto the wings, and was it really fun?

Example

Jim Corr apologised to her for touching her hand

- is enticing, and sets the mind racing with questions. But

Sat in front of the Corrs on a plane

- makes it sound as if she has a dull life, not an interesting one.

Example

Met Patrick Stewart

- is exciting if you are a Trekkie, but

For her, Patrick Stewart will always mean Christmas and intimate evenings - not 25th Century spaceships

starts the conversation off with three or four questions.

Example:

Lives in Trinidad

is mildly interesting. But

Where she works, the dress code for the office party is a swimsuit

paints a much more alluring picture.

Avoid Too Much Detail

The idea is to pose questions in the mind, not answer them all. And too much detail can narrow down the options by age or looks, or some other factor.

Example

He changed the recorded rainfall figures by urinating in his uncle's rain gauge

- is suitably vague. But

In 1935 he changed the rainfall figures recorded in Wootton Bassett, Wiltshire by urinating in his uncle's rain gauge

leaves no questions to be asked, and makes it clear that we are talking about someone born in the early 1930s.

Example:

He was once mistaken for an Oscar-winning actor in a gay bar in Greenwich Village

- leaves the field wide open. But say:

He was once mistaken for Jeremy Irons... etc etc.

- and you are looking for a tallish Englishman with a thin face and floppy dark hair.

Be Ambiguous or Even Surreal

Example

She has had a Grand Premier

- so she could be the former mistress of a national leader, or a cat breeder, or a movie actress (okay, different type of 'première'). Or any combination of the above.

Example:

He used to wear Hush Puppies and a string vest

- so he is definitely someone who will be asked the five 'W's - Who, Why, Where, When and with What else?

The Problem of No-shows

Anyone who doesn't show up leaves a hole in the game, so it is worth checking how the people who are there are getting on, and what cards they have. This also encourages the more reserved guests to join in. If they have got the card of a no-show, that means there will be a spare one left for them to have instead. Just swap the cards over¹. And make it clear ahead of time that you need to know if people are coming - you can always blame it on the catering.

Mix and Match... and Match, and Match

If you agree a person's Claim to Fame with them up front, then two people instantly have four things to talk about.

And they are off...

And topics of conversation crop up again during the evening, when someone finds someone else whose Claim to Fame has grabbed their imagination, but who they weren't actually looking for. Long after everyone has been found, you will hear things like

Ah great, you are the person who bought a car, sight unseen, in a phone call. I wanted to know what sort of car it was, and did you have any problems?

The other thing which happens is that people find they have interests in common, even if they have not stated them in their own Claim to Fame.

You went down the Wall of Death at Avoriaz? When did you do that? I did it last year!

Two people are talking about something they love - and without the game, they might never have discovered that they are both skiers.

Every Which Way, You Win

All in all, everyone has much more to talk about than if they have to drag up small-talk topics from thin air. And the point is to get people talking to other people, and talking about interesting times in their lives.

It doesn't actually matter if the cards aren't all matched up at the end of the evening, so long as everyone has a great time.