h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

While bent over a desk at my previous job, furiously checking pages for a magazine, the deadline of which was looming, I momentarily forgot where I was, and in the general panic which so often characterizes the fretful world of publishing, I unconsciously leant over to one side, cocking a leg as I did so. I then proceeded to evacuate a tremondous amount of gas from my bottom, infront of my superiors, all of whom were tremendous snobs. The noise was like a crack of thunder, and my immediate boss was aghast. Everything in the office seemed to stop perfectly still, frozen in disbelief. The blood drained from my boss's face, while my own cheeks (on my face) became a deep red colour. No amount of will or prayer can make that peculiar smell go away, or indeed prevent large numbers of your peer group smelling it either. My immediate superior, with not a trace of humour, and in almost trembling tones said to me, 'Thank you *very* much, Samuel.'

You're welcome, I thought to myself.

ok, that was really silly.




did you get fired?
FABT

No, unfortunately they made me work for them for a whole year more!