h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/A676541

I know that there is already an entry in the Edited Guide on bonsai (I've linked to it), but this is intended to complement that one, which is a general overview of bonsai. I've aimed this at people who have always wanted a bonsai, but either been afraid to try, or had them die off.

Comments requested!

Now, I realise I should have had a look at the entry on 'Bonsai' which might answer some of the questions I have.

Firstly what does this sentence mean: 'It is advisable to secure it in place by threading garden wire through the drainage holes in the pot and over the roots.' Do you mean put garden wire round the root ball and then tie it to the drainage holes or something else?

I had a bonsai tree given to me by a friend who grew it successfully for a number of years. She told me 'keep it moist always and drench it a couple of times a year and give it a haircut from time to time'. I had it for about 9 months, but it died after I gave it a haircut (I had given it several without ill effects before!)

It might be helpful to have a Q&A section, eg 'What do I do if ..'.

Otherwise, this looks like a really good entry.

Thanks for that. Actually the other entry doesn't explain any more about the wiring. I've rewritten that bit - I hope it's clearer now.

I doubt that the haircut killed your tree, unless you gave it a skinhead! There are many reasons why trees sometimes die, and it is sometimes a mystery to experienced bonsai growers, but trimming them isn't normally one of the reasons.

I'm not convinced about a Q&A - that could really be an entry of its own. I'd also be a bit concerned about giving inappropriate advice - if a tree is ailing, you'd need to know all the circumstances before diagnosing a possible cure.

I was considering putting in links to some websites which are more helpful than a FAQ. I know of three specialist bonsai sites which have a forum where you can get relevant advice from experienced bonsai growers. I think that may be the way to go - but what happens if one of them stops operating - wouldn't the entry be taken down? What do you think?

Hi Captain...

"...Do this by threading the wire over the top of the rootball and through the drainage hole(s) in the pot. You can then either wind the ends of the wire together under the pot, or attach it to a small stick, say a piece of garden cane, under the pot if it only has one hole..."

Sorry, you've lost me. What wire? What's it for? Is it to secure the sapling down? I think maybe you're assuming some knowledge here that non-gardening plant-killers like me don't have.

Other than that I think it's a good article; it's clear, easy to read and I like it.

Cheers Geoff

I have revisited that rather mysterious sentence, which actually made more sense before I corrected it!

I missed something out by pasting over the wrong bit, which I shall blame on the fact that I had to repost it about 5 times - kept failing to connect. Nothing to do with my expert proof-reading of course!

I think it's clear now, but if anybody thinks it's still obscure, shout!

Zarquon's Singing Fish - after some thought I decided to include the links I was talking about. I decided that if the moderators don't like them I can take them out again, and if they're happy (they should be, they're non-commercial and relevant and they all work) then people can visit them and make their own minds up.

Well now, I just started outdoor bonsaiing (if that's the word ) myself and this article provides excellently sound advice.

*Impressed*

It differs slightly from the advice I've got which is to cut off the tap root and replant outside in normal ground. This should be repeated once a year for the first two or three years and then the tree should be potted but I suspect that this probably doesn't matter much except possibly for those who want a nice thick trunk early on. Depends on the tree really, how amenable the trunk is to shaping etc.

If you're using a deep pot a cascade style tree would look good

I have to say that although what you say is probably true I have a Serissa indoor tree that came from Homebase and it is still going one year later (still worried about it's impending repotting though ) even though it is more or less exactly as you describe the typical indoor bonsai from a garden centre.

One piece of advice possibly missing is that if you want your tree to fruit (say if it's a crab apple or something) then it needs to be cross pollinated and so it is best to grow two or more of the same tree reasonably close together (in the same pot if you like).

Apart from that, a nicely written and sound pice of writing. My compliments.

Orcus

Makes more sense to me now, Captain.

This gets my vote. Onwards to the Guide!!

BTW - "That was easy, but all I have is a twig in a pot" -

Geoff

Thanks for the votes of confidence!

Orcus, the advice you have been given is sound, and will result in faster growth and a thicker trunk as you suggest. There are a variety of ways of growing bonsai - I went for one that was easy for people who are sure that they are serial plant-murderers - it is usually reliable, and avoids an artificial 'lopped' look.

Good luck with your serissa - not all shop-bought trees are duff, I have a Chinese Privet that is thriving on my windowsill which I bought from B&Q - but it was the only decent one on the shelf, and I have heard lots of sad tales.

I have not had a lot of success with serissa myself, but they look great, especially in flower. They don't like to be moved, and they stink when you prune the roots (hence the name serrisa foetida). Don't worry about repotting it though, you don't want it to get potbound. Just be careful not to overwater it for a couple of weeks afterwards. It's worth treating yourself to a good book or two if you haven't already.

I didn't want to get into stuff like fruiting because I wanted to keep the article as simple and basic as possible. I'm hoping that people will read this, think it sounds easy and have a go.

Mine's a Serissa Seroides so hopefully it won't stink (not holding my breath ). I have heard similar tales, when I got it, I looked it up on the net and almost all I saw was complaints about them dying after a few weeks. Mine is in a pretty damn big pot so I doubt that is a problem. Dare I suggest that most people don't bother to look after them properly. A bonsai is not a 'low maintenance' plant and they need feeding, they can't live on just water which is some people's idea of looking after houseplants.

Actually I did buy a book off amazon but got the wrong one, which is how I got into the outdoor thing I suspect that much of the advice for outdoor trees is very applicable to indoor ones too. Especially stuff about repotting etc.

My comments were merely little things I thought of, they are probably a little advanced for this article but hey ho, doesn't matter. Nice to have a chat about it anyhow.

Orcus

Hi Cap'n Kebab

I like this entry a lot, informative and entertaining all the way.

I can see the attraction in little trees (by the way, do you get miniature granny smiths if you get your cross-pollination right? That would be pretty ! And how about even *tinier* cherries?), but I fear a combination of lack of patience, need for a quick fix and having the finger of death when it comes to horticulture generally will conspire to prevent me from ever being the proud owner of a self grown bonsai. A man's got to know his limitations, as Inspector Harry Callaghan once said.

Thanks for a great read. Particularly liked some of your sub/headers!

These points really only highlight my ignorance but for what it's worth, two things that lost me:

>>It is a good idea to secure your tree in the pot with garden wire. Do this by threading the wire over the top of the rootball and through the drainage hole(s) in the pot. You can then either wind the ends of the wire together under the pot, or attach it to a small stick, say a piece of garden cane, under the pot if it only has one hole.<<

- Sorry, I still don't really get this. I know you've already revisited it more than once but I really don't! Perhaps you could make it clearer what the advantage of 'securing' it is. Even then, I can't quite picture what I am supposed to do with my garden wire.

>>You should pinch out the tip of the central leader

- I don't really know what you mean by 'pinch out the tip' here.

Well, now that I have demonstrated what a houseplant's worst nightmare I am, I'm off to see how my own (non-artificially) little green victims are doing. Haven't checked for a while.

Nice entry, good luck with it.

Seeya
Spiff

Excellent article! Informative and easy to read.

Since I'm jumping in after several people have commented, many of the problems they mentioned have since been fixed. One thing: where exactly do you get the wire? Is it commonly sold in garden stores?

Wish this article had been around when I gave bonsais to my mom- she killed both of them.

"Now all I've got is a twig in a pot"

In sum: definitely Guide-worthy!


Nireena

Thanks for all these pointers as well as the encouragement - sometimes it isn't easy to see where I'm being obscure.

I've had another go at that wiring bit, and explained where to get it as well - if anybody still finds it confusing tell me - I want to get it so anybody can understand it, especially if they have no experience. I've also rewritten that bit about pinching out the central leader. Nothing to do with Tony Blair.

This will disappoint you, Spiff, but the fruit, and for that matter the flowers are all normal size. The trick is to grow trees with naturally small fruit, like crab apples.

Orcus, having indicated elsewhere that you are in Birmingham - I've been told (although I haven't been)that there's a really good bonsai nursery in Nottingham, which might be worth you finding. It's run (or was - I was told this a couple of years back) by a chap called Harry Tomlinson, who has written quite a comprehensive general book on bonsai.

Thanks- that sentence about the wire makes perfect sense now. I can picture in my head what I'm supposed to do.

Excellent job!


Nireena

It has only just occurred to me but it would seem sensible to explain what 'Bonsai Trees' are in the first place.

Just a thought.

Spiff

Good point, Spiff, thanks. I've put a brief sentence at the beginning.

And thanks for the thumbs-up Nireena.

Editorial Note: This conversation has been moved from 'Peer Review' to 'Bonsai for Beginners'.

This thread has been moved out of the Peer Review Forum because your entry has now been recommended for the Edited Guide.

You can find out what will happen to your entry here: http://www.h2g2.com/SubEditors-Process

Congratulations!

Spiff

- that was quick!

Well done sir.

. On me.

Geoff