h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/A660476

A look at both Sex and Cybersex. What does everyone think?

I think you want your title to be "Sex vs. [or versus] Cybersex."

There are several typos. You might want to simply copy this text and put it into the spell/grammer checker on your word processor.

Additionally, I would make your "what is sex" section have a link to the "sex" entry,

http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/A5176

as well as making your "what is cybersex" section have a link to the "cybersex" entry:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/A375527

With that in mind, your entry is now very short. Perhaps you could elaborate on each pro/con, rather than try to fit lots of information into a one-liner. Definately elaborate more on the psychological effects/reprecutions of cyber vs. real (this falls under the "can it be special" point.)

As with anything I say, feel free to ignore me.

-Strider

why is pregnacy a disadvatage ?

& use a to credit the dictionary you took the quote from.

And a popular on-line dictionary gave me the following defination of Cybersex

"Sexual activity or arousal through communication by computer"

Your definition of Sex is a very limited one. By your definition, gay people can't have sex with each other at all! And you are also omitting oral sex between man and woman. It looks like you're getting a kick out of spelling out words like penis and vagina in big letters. Instead of that, try and come up with some sort of a general description of sex which includes most of the things people think of as sex.

Your description of cybersex implies that it is cold and clinical: you say you are unlikely to get an orgasm. But anything that causes sexual arousal can lead to an orgasm. It's surprising that you haven't mentioned masturbation at all: this must surely be an important part of cybersex.

I agree with the said above. The entry as it stands now is very thin, and from a personal point of view. It doesn't add anything new to the already existing edited entries.

Bye,

HELL

One more thing that I noticed: By your sex definition, if the man does not ejaculate it isn't sex.

-Strider

A couple of points:

An earlier poster asked "Why is pregnancy necessarily a disadvantage?" Perhaps you could amend that line to "unwanted pregnancy".

I agree that the definition of sex given is too narrow. That's why there's a debate about whether or not having cybersex while in a relationship with someone can be considered cheating. The ethics of cybersex might be a subtopic to explore in your article.

Overall, it's a good start but needs more depth.

Cheers.

One thing I noticed was that the person who wrote that definition of sex clearly wasnt' very good at it.
One stroke and he's done by the sound of it

More seriously I also think the article is a bit thin for inclusion in the edited guide. Not sure how to improve it though

Seems to me that this would be a good basis for a collaborative entry or talking point of some kind - but I have to agree that it's a little thin as is. The question of what is sex and what is cybersex will be amply remedied by a link to the existing Edited Entries (neither of which are particularly good, but that's a seperate issue).

The comparison between the two, which is the real point of the entry, is going to need a bit more work, though - best of luck!

I will be working on this again soon. If you would like to help work on this as a collaborative entry then I have already started a conversation up there.

spook

ps. thanks for all the points

Editorial Note: This conversation has been moved from 'Peer Review' to 'Sex verus Cybersex'. We're moving this Conversation in preparation for the forthcoming Review Forums system. To migrate over to the new system, we're making sure that there aren't any duplicates of entries in the various Review Forums, and as this is now in the Collaborative Writing Workshop at http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/F57152?thread=155475 we're moving this Conversation to the entry itself. Hope this makes sense! :-)