h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Here is where you get your weapons

*looks around*


hmmmm, i think i'll have that one, that one, that one, and that one, that one ,that one and errrrrrmmmm, that one and that one. Oh, and that one.

Ah, Creachy - good to see you up and about again

BTW : It is I... L'eclair... I mean Terran

i guessed, couldn't give us a hand with all this stuff could you?


*slightly sways as the concrete floor beneath his feet (which incidently are now supporting about 2 tonnes per cubic centimetre) starts to crack and sink*

I back in charge again you know? But I'll help you

*gets a fork lift truck and gathers some crates*

Oh i'm sorry, how rude of me..

*drops all the stuff with a thud on the floor. that's all that happened in the immediate vicinity which is quite magnificant considering the weight of the package. a small 'thud', exactly as it sounds, that's onomatapoeia you know. oh, and a small mouse hiding in the wall had a minor stroke but he'll recover in time for tea. the big impact happened 18 miles away on a small hill made of mainly loose rocks, the reverberating shockwaves of the small 'thud' picked up menace, who was rather surprised as he'd never been picked up by a small 'thud' before but he thought what the hell, it's gotta be worth a ride, and caused the loose rocked hill to exert a small landslide which landed on an ant called Tim, who died, and left behind 4 million brothers, 7 million sisters and one very upset mother*

*the upshot of this was, of course, that colonel creepy remebered his rank and delivered a rather exquisitly executed Rimmer salute*

*returns salute*

At ease... I'm just patrolling...

and may i say sir, you haven't lost any of your patrollability over the years. an excellent patroller if ever i saw one, if i may be so bold as to say the BEST patroller i've ever seen

Ah surely not... no no, I have to agree with you my patrolling is quite spectacular... I once patrolled for England you know? All had to stop though when those bloody Belgians kicked up a fuss... I'll never know why... I only poured ten cups of tea down their trousers, it wasn't as if it was lemonade now was it?

hi all how are wee all