h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Yes, the ubiquitous loo roll dispenser as found in every office, school, hospital and asylum around the world. Whoever designed the thing must be chuckling quietly to themself. Design reached it's pinnacle with the advent of the loo roll dispenser.

Thousands, perhaps millions of these, are installed worldwide, supposedly for the neat an convenient storage and distribution of loo roll. Fine. No problem there.

Except there is. When have you ever seen a loo-roll dispenser actually being used as a loo roll dispenser. Oh sure, yes for the first week after being installed, but no sooner has it been installed than someone loses the key (why people feel a need to lock up loo-roll in the first place is beyond me!). From that point onwards, the dispenser acts as a ledge to stand loo-roll on.

The ultimate in useless design yet still deemed essential by every office around the world ...

Does this make it a good design or bad design ... who knows ...

the reason loo roll is locked up is so people don't nick it. not that most people would want to, but if it saves a few pence at the supermarket...
and i think that they are very useful things even if they are only being used as ledges
^. .^
= ' =

Yes, but they make rotten ledges because they usually have a curved top. And why would anybody want to nick loo-roll from work? It's always that horribly thin scratchy stuff.

And what about those holders that hold a huge great industrial roll with serrations all around the bottom so you scratch your hand when the end gets lost inside? I mean, why the serrations? The loo roll always has perforated bits, and it's not the end of the world to rip it off anyway. One of life's small but persistent irritations.

I have a friend who used to nick loo rolls from work. As it was a Doctor's surgery it was pretty nice. Now that they put in the sheets that come out one at a time she doesn't do it. So they must be good design. Except when I use them I usually drop half of them on the floor, so some sort of tray underneath might work.

The same problem occurs with those interleaved paper towels you find in wall-mounted dispensers, or more regularly in a pile beneath them. This is usually due to cleaning ladies who think that it is a good idea to not merely overfill the dispenser, but to actively cram the things in until they are bulging out the slot at the bottom while the top of the dispenser will no longer close properly, so that there is a chance they may not have to fill it the following evening. Thus, when you pull the bottom sheet, between 10 and 20 sheets will pop out in a lump, landing on the floor. This will happen for the next two or three uses, depending on how muscular and enthusiastic the particular cleaning lady was. It's not a case of bad design; just that the people maintaining the system don't read the instructions. Ever. A bit like life in that respect, really.

speaking as someone who has had to do that particular wonderful job in my long list of 'crap jobs i have done' i have to say that cleaning ladies are never actually given the instructions. most of the dispenser keys dont work and it is easier to open them with a nail file/othersuitableimplement. also the 'person' who desigtned the loo roll packets never met the person who designed the loo roll dispenser because even if the dispenser is empty you can still not fit a whole packet or two whole packets inside. there is invarably a bit left over. so don't blame all cleaning ladies, just the lazy ones!

FABT

I've noticed a "fill line" on the towel dispensers, which seems to be exactly one packet from the bottom, leaving an inch-and-a-half gap at the top... Odd, that...

Ah, but you see, Peet, if it doesn't say "Do not, on pain of death, fill above this line" people won't pay attention.

Just look at Kettles - they have a max fill line but how often do you over fill (albeit accidentally) and then the minute the kettle boils, boiling water makes a break for freedom ...

Strangely enough, I don't own a kettle any more...

and has anyone ever seen a loo well lit enough that you can read anything written on the inside of a loo roll dispenser?

and anyway, what are you supposed to do with the ten paper towels that are left over?

FABT

Loo Roll Dispensers are crap. I used to work in a cinema in Leicester Square, and one day I had to refill EVERY DISPENSER IN THE BUILDING, and if you've ever been to the Empire then you'll know that's a lot, anyway you have to take out the dwindling rolls even if they aren't spent, so on one arm you've got evil huge industrial rolls which are yet to be inserted, then on the other you've got smaller removed ones. And you're fumbling with the key. And you're wearing a humiliating hat.
So then I'm trying to fit one of these rolls whilst balancing the rest of my terrible load, and a well-known celebrity barges into the cubicle. As you can imagine, I am startled by this, and the rolls, the key, the hat and everything fly in all directions.
Thus I am feeling like an utter idiot in front of a major singing star. Like I said, loo roll dispensers are crap.