h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

LLarmasare biger than fogs, an imprtant thing to remeber that

Wonder Bread should make you wonder... because bread, it isn't.

Blimy, I never thought of that before
s
thank you by the way, your email stoped me from making a ferly big mistake

Have a potato crisp... well, all right, *half* a potato crisp?

WOW a whle patato chip..for me you are to good to me

here have a freshly maide
(well my mum has to be good for somthin )

!

*looks around, alarmed*

They definitely said 'No Spitting'. I am in violation of House Rules. Peta will have to Moderate me.

But there were mitigating circumstances, really! There were NUTS in the Bob offered. Fine thing, trying to poison us! We're lethally allergic to nuts. Had no choice but to spit.... Sorry, really...

Besides, I can clean *that* up myself. Who would drag my sorry carcase out of here, if I had NOT spit?

Carcases - Bob, next time, tell Mum no gnarsty nuts, please - Peta *hates* it when people *die* inside h2g2. It has a way of casting such a pall...

{{Auntie, no puns. - Everyone else}}

Right. No puns. *grabs Bob's hankie and cleans up nutty spittle, offers it back*

Ta ta, stranger-boy; who are *you* stranger than ?

Auntie, who is getting rude looks from the rest of LeKZ

I thought she was more botherd about the extra paper work when people die in this dump

well for a start I can make you look normal..but that would be boring
my onld web site did
then I decided that I had much better things to do than scer so many people and took it down

I also wrote a few short stoies, they where freeky

but in general I am stranger then myself..wich is a verry hard thing to do with out the help of two rabbies a chicken and a set of pathetic excuses for perants (hay I said I wasnt goin to cover for them any more ).

talkin about storyes and stuff my ido carrer starts on sunday
I have a phone in from 10pm-2am

and I have decided the topic for the niht is the proplems with watery Guinness...wich after a rather long argument I have been told to change for some strange reason

I just re read a lot of theat and I realised it makes no sence
ime on top form then

and just makin shure I ment no offence with the making you look normal comment

*looking around, warily*


shhh...don't let on, but there are normal people here and they might see that... should we let them know? you're right, it's best not to scare em...


BOOGABOOGA

hah.
*wanders away, twitching and mumbling, with occasional howls*

so they are boring, normal people I mean. and any way I dont think you will find many normal people reound this dump

but just to make shure they dont bother us to much I will set my pet free to scer them off

*tying your hands apart so you can't clap them, because Evil is something you're not... we grew up with Evil, and you're not a thing like him*

Scare the normals away by whatever means possible... to punch 3 little holes in their buns is a good way (buns=cheeks, the soft parts of their bums).

We're off and on, mostly off for a coupla days. Got a gnarsty virus and have to sleep clock round. ...So don't worry, it wasn't the odour or anything!

Loveya, and you are really, really not Evil. Will email you some of those horrific poetry links so you get some perspective... You can't have a clue, otherwise.

Various and sundry people, in an body, for LeKZ

get well soon hun

and I know I am note really evil, at least I do most of the time. yesterday I was just in a strange mood thats all. proberbly because I started that book. I have just finished describing her birth. it is ofdd. I can remeber that so clearly, and little els from that long ago. oh well


Ive decided I am goin to write another song
the book is to well diffacult right now, I think I need to move out first

so now alls I need is a topic, I was thinking of s
faling that any ideas??

Song topics:

Llamas?
Pains in the backside?

--------------
Seriously, when our best friend of our whole life died, we had to write grief songs for about a year (all but one of which were really bad... ) to help us get used to this absence in our world. It hurt, but it helped.

When we finally told the body's mother to just get lost, that was another spate of (mostly heavy metal style) angry adolescent grief+rage songs. That was just this January, after she barged back into our life uninvited and left tyre tread marks all over the inside of our head (to say nothing of the bullets, mother=drive by shooting, lovely imagery, ). We have always written songs to try to stay more or less sane...

I did say 'try'!

Here, catch

Going to crawl off to bed again soon... all of us for LeKZ

I have only ever wrote one song to my perants, thay havent seen it yet. it starts

"where were you
when I was burned and I was brokn"

its a good song, got a nice guitare part in it

and sanity fistly is subjective, and secondly is boring, the sane people tend to be the sheep.

just baked it theis morning s it tasty
S

*THWACKED WITH FLAN*

mmph. umm.

Yum. That'sh tashty. Shticky though...

We only alwaysh write hate-poetry to the parentsh. But oursh were actively vicioush. Yoursh were shelfish and abshent. Shticky.

Talk to you shoon ash we've eaten thish flan.



Shticky pershonsh called LeKSH

why do you think I started it where were you

I am goin to have to get round to sending you some of my lyrics
most of them are just about random things. quite good though, or so Elly tells me but she may be slightly bias

S