h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

...I do not know how this could have been missed out. Classic storylines with cross and doublecross, characters switching from 'heel' to 'babyface' to 'heel', fighting agogo, good names, good music, fan interaction, the colourful commentators, the madness, the unbelievable, the pyrotechnics and the spectacle. I would try and explain a plot, but it would get way too convuluted, way to quickly.
OK then maybe one (this could get dull but then skip to the last paragraph) - Stone Cold Steve Austin (The Texas Rattlesnake) was out of wrestling for a year (after spinal operations). The way it was explained was he was run over by a car, in the WWF parking lot, by an unknown assailant. He returns, vowing to find out who did it to him, and then beat the snot out of them. After running rampant through other peoples matches and the lockeroom, generally running around and beating people up, over the course of a couple of weeks he finds out it was Rakishi. Now Rakishi says that he did it to help The Rock (The Most Electrifying Man in Sports-Entertainment), and Rakishis cousin, become WWF Champion. The Rock says it ain't so and so THEY start fighting. After the feud between The Rock and Rakishi has been built up, Triple H (The Cerebal Assassin) steps up and says he made Rakishi do it. Triple H gets his backside royally wipped by Stone Cold, and eventually tries a plan to run over Stone Cold again. It backfires and StoneCold lifts the car with TripleH (with a forklift) and drops him from 'fourty feet in the air', but that is not enough Stone Cold wants the Championship belt again, so off he goes trying to get it.

The Rock is the champion, and to get the belt Stone Cold must beat him, time and again The Rock manages to win, so one night there is a championship match, The Rock vs. StoneCold. What happens is that StoneCold, with help from Vince MacMahon (the owner of the Federation and 'The Devil Incarnate' according to the announcers - he did put his wife in a private sanitorium and got his cronies to beat up his son (in the WWF world, not the real world)) and a Steel Chair beat the living snot out of The Rock again and again (Oh my God, he's busted wide open!). Now so what you say, but StoneCold (now called a Sell Out and The Bionic Redneck) once put Vince in a wheelchair after being fired by him. Next night he beats up the injured Rock again with a Steel Chair, but this time Vinces Son-in-Law helps him out, Vinces Son-in-Law being non other than TripleH. The Rock is beaten up a couple more nights, when Vince MacMahon 'suspends him for his own saftey'. StoneCold and TripleH then go on a rampage, as they say no-one can stop them, they start picking on some of the women. This riles up the brothers of The Undertake (Deadman Walking) and Kane (The Big Red Machine). Now these are big men, 'Taker is 6'10'' and Kane is 7'0'', now known as the Brothers of Destruction come and stand the ground, StoneCold and TripleH run. The scene is now set for these two collossul powers to meet and settle their diferences.

Now this is just the short version. It doesn't go into the MacMahon-StoneCold history, the 'Taker-Kane history (as a start 'Taker burned his brothers face when he was six, and generally it weent downhill from there, but due to a twist of the story line they are now The Brothers of Destruction). It didn't go into the takeover of WCW that Vince undertook, or the stealing it right from under his nose that his son (Shane) managed, or their battle, where his wife came out from her medication and kicked him in the 'nads. It doesn't mention any of the other wrestlers and their storylines. WWF is a soap opera without the dull bits I would recommend watching it to anyone, but if you decide to give it a shot, then give it two or three weeks to get the characters and storylines sorted, a bit of enthusiasm and then you, too, will see the into the incredible world of the WWF.
BCNU - Crescent

Intrigue! Mystery! Romance! Egregious violence! WWF is almost as good as Sunset Beach or Days of Our Lives, and the dialogue's often better. The only thing missing is for someone to get a voodoo curse and start losing all their matches.

The Prophet.