St Andrews is a small, pretty town situated on the East Neuk¹ of Fife in Scotland. Nearby towns that also may be of interest to the hitchiker are the beautiful coastal villages of Crail and Anstruther and the city of Dundee, about 15 miles away across the river Tay. The chain walk at Elie can also be a lot of fun providing the tide is out. It is of course, most famous for being the home of golf and for having the oldest university in Scotland.

Transport to St Andrews

St Andrews has no railway station so unless you are in a car you will have to go to Leuchars where the nearest railway station is. Unless you want to wait for hours in the freezing cold for the very rare buses you are then forced to get a taxi, the fares being correspondingly extortionate.
Occasionaly some lucky travellers are able to scrounge lifts off kindhearted townsfolk or mobile students.

Places to Stay

It is geared up well for the tourist so there is plenty of hotel accommodation ranging from the cheap and cheerful bed-and-breakfast, to the sumptuous Old Course Hotel.

Getting About in St Andrews

There is no underground railway. The reason for this is that there isn't much call for one in a town that takes about 30 minutes to walk round if you've got a severe limp. There are three major streets in St Andrews. North Street, Market Street and South Street, linked by other minor roads.
North Street features the cinema, some of the more important university buildings and some golf shops.
Market Street has the main shopping centre, some of the better pubs and restaurants and some golf shops.
South Street features again lots of pubs, a few restaurants and some golf shops.
At the east end of these three roads you will find the Cathedral and at the west end, the 18th Green of the Old Course, oh and a few more golf shops.

If you really don't want to walk there is, astonishingly, a local taxi firm who will be happy to drive you around.

What to See in St Andrews

Oh, all right then... golf. You can't miss golf in St Andrews, approximately 90% of the shops sell at least something relating to golf. The famous Old Course's 18th green is situated very close to the town centre and there are five other courses in the near vicinity. You can of course see the old clubhouse next to the 18th green and the Old Course Hotel is to be seen to the west. Women and non-members can get into the Royal and Ancient clubhouse (R&A) on St. Andrews day² for free. Being lectured by ancient St Andrews golfing royalty is also gratis.

The University. This is about the only other thing St Andrews is famous for and there are a number of fine old buildings relating to the university, these are mostly situated on North Street. From North Street, you can go to the east and find the Cathedral, which, considering it was mostly pulled down during the reformation is well worth a visit. Also from North Street you can go further north to a smaller road called The Scores. This goes west to the 18th Green and east to the castle, again worth a look but you will have to pay to look around its interior. There is a ceilidh³ in the castle grounds every May which is a student run thing, but you get to look round the castle and dance too (which is much more fun but mostly due to the kilts and the uneven ground). The Scores is also on the coast so you can wander down for a walk on the beach from there. If you possess a wet suit, an iron constitution and are clinically insane you can take a dip in the sea (its the North Sea - its freezing at the best of times).

Golf In St Andrews

If you wish to play golf in St Andrews you will have no problem, all courses except the Old Course are open to the general public. If you want to play the Old Course the best move is to buy a house in St Andrews.⁴ This will have two effects.

• It will annoy the locals, causing house prices to rise to even more ridiculous levels and force them to move to Kirkcaldy or Glenrothes.
• It will entitle you to a golf pass from the local council. This costs around £90 a year and allows you to play on all the courses in St Andrews for free for a period of one year (guests are also allowed on the Old Course with this card).

Do not expect playing golf in St Andrews to be fun. It is extremely windy there. Wind speed is rarely below gale force so all your drives will be shortened or be blown into either the sea or the gorse.⁵ You may also get the Haar coming in. This is a thick sea fog that regularly gets blown over the town. You will invariably be caught by the rain (or even snow if you're really unlucky). This of course, is horizontal due to the wind and will get you so cold that you lose all sensation in your fingers. This is detrimental to your swing. If you ever go in a bunker, do not under any circumstances try and play your ball out again. Some bunkers in St Andrews are known to be deeper than the mid-Atlantic Ocean. You may need rescuing yourself if you attempt to enter one.
On a more positive note, the town is so far north that in the summer, it doesn't get significantly dark until around 11pm. You can therefore start a round of golf as late as 7pm and still complete 18 holes.

Unlike in England, golf in St Andrews is relatively relaxed and unsnobby. There are no real dress restrictions, except that is on the Old Course, so wear denim and trainers if you want.

The Six Golf Courses in St Andrews

The Balgove. A glorified Pitch and Putt, excellent for the beginner. Only nine holes but going round twice is included in the price.

The Strathtyrum. Locally known as the Strath or the Stratheasy. It is a full 18 holes but is very short and is a good course to play if you like getting low scores to show off with. The R&A value this course so highly that they use it as a car park during major tournaments.

The Eden. A nice course, not too hard but up to most normal golf course standards. Much tougher than the Strath.

The Jubilee. Supposedly harder than the Old Course. This course is not for the faint hearted, it features two par-fives longer than the Amazon River.

The New Course. Hardest of all, blood capilliaries are considered to be wider than the fairways on this course.

The Old Course. The most famous golf course in the world. Scene of The Open many times. Under no circumstances play this course unless you are very good at golf. The 18th Green is right next to the town centre and you will be watched by lots of tourists and serious golfers as you approach it. It is even possible to watch the 18th green on a live webcam. Be confident you will play a decent shot.

Things to Do

Apart from golf and sightseeing, there is not much else to do except go somewhere else during the day. The foothills of the Grampians are a short drive away and so it can be a good base for hillwalking. In the winter, snow permitting, having a car opens up all sorts of skiing opportunities, not along the lines of the Alps, but its better than going clubbing in Dundee.

Shopping

If you're after golf equipment and/or cheap tacky tourist souvenirs you're in the right place. It's also quite good for cold weather clothes and mountaineering equipment. There are also a good number of shops that cater for woollen wear. If you want anything else useful though, go to Dundee or (even better) Edinburgh.

Pubs

St. Andrews has a plethora of rather good pubs with some excellent ales available. Among the best are:

The Cellar Bar (Bell St - between South St and Market St). This, as the name suggests is underground. It is small, but has perhaps the best beer in St Andrews. In addition, if you're friendly to Malcolm, the landlord, he might treat you to a tasting session of his fine collection of single malt whiskies. You can even email him at [email protected]

The Whey Pat Tavern (Kinnessburn Rd - west end of South St). A fine traditional working man's pub. Famed for its domino evenings and probably the only dartboard in town.

Ogstons (South St). A trendier style of pub. Caters mainly for the younger pub-goers and has a disco-of-sorts on a Friday night. The nearest thing to a nightclub in St Andrews unless you go to...

The Students Union (North St). You'll have to persuade a passing student to sign you in here but it possesses the only real nightclub in town.

Ma Belle's (The Scores). Has good food and is an excellent venue if there happens to be a rugby or football match on. Free drinks can be won on these occasions.

The Westport (South St). An odd one this but it has a beer garden which is open all three days of the summer (be prepared to wear all-weather gear), lots of board games are available (Chess, Monopoly, Risk, Backgammon etc). It is also excellent for a cup of tea or coffee and has a superb range of continental style sandwiches and cakes available at lunchtimes.

The Vic (Market St). Probably the trendiest pub in St Andrews.

Homelea (North St). Has loads of games too, always a bit of a squeeze but has good beer, a warm atmosphere and the odd elusive local (usually playing dominoes and muttering in dialect).

Restaurants

Restaurants are generally pretty expensive in St Andrews, presumably because there isn't much to do except go out for a meal in the evening (unless you're a pub goer). However, they can be very good.

The New Balaka (Market St). Reputed to be the oldest Indian restaurant in the UK (around 250 years old). This may be true but their claim of being the best Indian restaurant in Scotland isn't. They may well be the most expensive however. Don't expect a meal here to cost less than £20. Average to good Indian food.⁶

The KFB (Kinness Fry Bar - Kinnessburn Rd). Not strictly a restaurant but no visit to Scotland is complete without trying a deep-fried Mars Bar. The complete chippy. Is there anything they won't dunk in hot fat? Highlights incluse deep-fried pizza, deep-fried haggis and an excellent range of kebabs.

The Vine Leaf (South St). Expensive and portions are small - but the food is excellent and the service very friendly.

Jahingir (South St, next to Ogstons). Indian restaurant, does an excellent value lunchtime buffet. The food is not of the highest calibre however.

Cafe India (Market St). Massive takeout portions, pretty good sit down menu and nowhere near as extortionate as the New Balaka.

Littlejohn's (Market St). Distinctively, it has a globe above the front door. Rather good food and has a warm atmosphere. A popular restaurant.

The Grange. A little out of town but the food and wine are very nice indeed. A little expensive but well worth it.

Things You Won't See in St Andrews

Locals. They are rumoured to exist but are seldom seen. They reputedly congregate in The Stables Pub outside the town centre but entering this establishment is considered to be a risky business.

Scottish People. Almost everybody in St Andrews is either English or American. The Americans are there for the golf and the English are at the university. Don't ask them if they applied to Oxford or Cambridge.

McDonalds or Burger King. The Town Council thinks they would lower the tone of the area. Opinion is divided on this subject.

Nightclubs.