h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

as a child of the television and computer age this is what i have to say to radios_ phooy, get lost, you useless piece of junk.
was that too harsh? ah well it is not like radios have feelings

What is the difference between a radio tuned to radio one, and a brick? A brick is useful.

Radios ....Radio.....RADIO .... without it your mailings probably wouldnt be here. Radio is almost certainly the most important invention of the century , Forget Zoe Ball and Chris Evans and consider what radio does for you every day , Guides aircraft , carries telephony , data , voice , pictures around the globe almost instantly. The Internet would be crippled without it , planes would CRASH on a daily basis , sad people would starve , how do you heat a plasticised homogonised peice of crap (insert your favorite Linda Mac dish here) without your microwave. Its instant , its everywhere at once and its almost free , especially if you have a Healthy and Blatant disregard of liscensing laws(highly reccomended).RADIO IS GREAT!

don't get all emotional now.

Did you hear that the winner of this years Darwin Award, (for those who remove themselves from the gene pool in the most special way,) has been awarded to a security guard in Manitoba. He used to keep warm at night by sitting in front of the transmission horn of a microwave relay. Spent Xmas Eve sitting in a plastic chair with a 12 pack and some magazines. No one told him about the 10 fold power increase due to all the Xmas phone traffic. All his beer exploded as well...

any chance of the security gaurd incident in ".avi"

Sorry, I'm new to this, and you'll have to limit your vocabulary to the five year old level, and draw suitable coloured pictures for me to understand. When I know what you want me to do, I'll happily comply.

Funny though, aint it? The first runner up was better. Two brother decided to destroy a bees nest in their shed, with the equivalent explosive power of a half stick of dynamite. On lighting the fuse, they retired to the house, and watched the event from a window 12 FEET from Ground Zero. The explosion shattered the glass, causing various severe cuts. One of the brothers decided to take his sibling to hospital. On the way to the car, three bees stung the more injured brother, who went into anyphylactic shock, and died.