h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

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*Amos arrives carrying his plumbers toolbag, and smoking a dog end as he goes. According to the note left by Pandora at his Shed, the door should be open and nobody at home, however he knocks to make sure.
There is no reply, so he enters the cottage, firstly nipping his dog-end and placing it behind his ear. He dons waders and starts to survey the damage caused by the flooding pool. As the note said, everything is easy to find as everything is identified with a small picture or carving. He can see the door leading to the sauna (a palm tree carving) and to the pool (a waterfall carving), there are many more, including one to the rear of the building which has a skull and crossbones carved into it. This is Pandora's bedroom, and is strictly an 'off limits' area.*
*At first glance, the damage seems quite extensive, but on closer inspection, isn't as bad as was thought. The fact that there is a step up to the bedroom, has effectively saved that area of the house from any damage. He enters the room with the pool and looks about.
First order of the day is to get the pool drained. After a quick hunt, he realises he is going to have to get wet, as he needs to enter the pool to get to the drain point. He sighs heavily as the water is going to be cold. He strips down and dons an old wetsuit, but with the agility and grace of a professional smimmer, he enters the water and dives smoothly below the surface. For an old man, you can still see the ripple of muscle across his back, for despite his age, he is fitter than most men half his age. A lifetime of working in all weathers, and being able to turn his hand to anything has kept this wily old coyote lean and strong.*
*What seems like an eternity passes and then he bursts from the pool clutching a large plug in his hand, a small whirlpool is beginning to form in the centre of the pool. He clambers out and towels himself down, getting changed again. He takes a swig from a hip flask, and the amber fluid starts to warm his body.*

Roight, I reckons that'll takes a few hours ter drain, then I can starts on inspecting the damage proper. I best gets over t'pub and see iffen the mistress is around.

*heads off to the Crossed Purposes Pub*

*Pandora sees Amos leave but he's too far away to hear her cal out...goes into her cottage...looks about* "My Hell!" *leaves a note
for Amos incase she dosen't run into him: Sir, please help yourself to anything you like in any of the wet bars (no pun intended)...there's a 100 year old bottle of rye I'd like you to have.
You'll find it on the top shelf of the bar in the pool room. Pandora

*returns from the Crossed Purposes, after a hearty breakfast, ready to commence work. Spies the note pinned to the door, reads, removes and enters the house...*

*After much tracing of pipework and general plumber type stuff, he has found the cause of the leak, but with it being so cold, and naturally the heating and water are off, he has headed over to the pub for a hot drink.
This done, he trudges back through the fresh snowfall and enters the house once more.
He suddenly remembers the open fire and sets about getting it going.
This aids in heating the house and starting the dry out process.
The place is a mess, rugs are lifted and sent to the cleaners, thankfully the water hasn't damaged the wooden floors, due to the 5 layers of varnish on them.
A few skirting boards need replaced, but generally the house is sound, and structurally has suffered little. Most damage is cosmetic.
He finishes fixing the leak, having replaced all the washers and gromits on the pool pump, and given it a good service.
He switches on the water and hears the tank filling, checking for any minor leaks at all joins in the pipework.
All appears well.
He remembers the bottle of 100yo rum, promised to him by his current employer. He fetches it from the wet bar (no pun intended) as she had told him, opens and savours the smell. He pours a small ammount into a glass, warms, sips and smacks his lips together. It is wonderful stuff, but he is working and he puts the bottle away. He has standards and priorities with his work, despite his general apperance and attitude to life.
He sets about replacing the damaged skirting boards...

*After a weeks solid work, he is finally finished. "PANDORA'S BOX" is back to it's former spleandour. Amos is happy that it was a job well done. He tidies up, sets the place straight, removes all trace of him being there and closes up. But not before laying in fresh groceries, fresh flowers, and setting a fresh fire in the hearth.*
*He goes off to the pub to find Pandora and tell her the good news*