h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

~You finally track "Blackstone" down at the Front Desk, actually located in the very back of the display part store. It is a huge, centuries old oak desk with various candles providing the light he uses to work by. The only other light in the building comes from the torches along the walls. There are no windows, no electric lights. Behind him is a door leading back into the storage area. A sign on it reads "Employees Only: Abandon All Hope, Ye Who Enter Here". As you approach, he seems not to notice you -- he is engrossed in the activity of copying, by hand, with a plumed pen, the text of one book into another -- until you come right up to the desk. Suddently he raises his head, and the glowing coals of his eyes penetrate you ask he speaks~

Yes?

~You immediately wish you hadn't bothered him, but he encourages you to speak~

In what way may I help you?

*looks slightly uncomfortable*
hi... very nice shop you've got here...
*forces a smile, then decides to skip the small talk*
do you have anything for suppressing multiple personalities? you see, i have this irritating personaility that keeps popping up at the most inopportune times...

~Blackstone lays aside his pen and stands up from his grand desk~

A Personality Suppressing Potion? Nothing is coming to me off hand, but it does sound familiar. You'll have to excuse my memory. I /am/ 1400 years old. I'll need to check the catalogue.

~He walks over to a large podium with two oversized, red candles burning on either of the top corners, and a book so large it may contain ever potion known to human kind. In fact, it does. Blackstone opens it to the index in the back~

Personality Suppression... hmmmmm....

Personality Creation.... Personality Multiplication... Personality Suppression! See "The Gemini Solution", page 55075.

~Blackstone flips the pages to 55075, runs his fingers across the page~

Ah, we have some in stock. Follow me.

~He strides off into the labrynth of shelves, until he comes to a large, black wine bottle, with a tag on it. He looks at the tag, and you could swear that the lights that couldn't possibly be shinning in his eyes grow brighter momentarily. He removes the cork~

Smell that.

~He places the open bottle under your nose. The aroma rising from the liquid inside is at first pleasant and rosey, but soon the sweetness of it is overwhelming, and you stagger back a bit. The shop keeper replaces the cork.~

This is known as the Gemini Solution. An uncharacteristically droll play on words for its creator, Magnus Devlin. He means "Solution" in both the chemical sense, and in the sense that it solves the duality problem. A sip of this concotion will put your second personality away in the back of your mind for a period of one day. A shot glass full will keep her there for a week, half a tumbler for a month, and so on and so forth. Drinking the whole bottle at once is /highly/ inadvisable.

~He hands you a card. On is is written an encantation~

Read this encantation before drinking the potion. Finish it by speaking the name of the personality that you wish to suppress. You must be very careful in the recitation, because failure to speak it appropriately will suppress /your/ personality. Being suppressed is like being in a jail cell, but with the added torture of being able to watch what your more irritating personality is doing the whole time.

Hello - Blackstone? I like the looks of this shop of yours... Especially the bookshelves... You wouldn't happen to have a copy of Necronomicon, would you??

*takes the potion carefully*
thank you...
*backs away a bit, still rather nervous*
h-how much do i owe you?

Sea, I'll charge that to your STUMPED account. Work it out with the Krymla Leader, later.

~Turning his chill gaze upon Alien~

I do believe I have a copy of the tombe you seek. "The Necronomicon"? Yes, if you will follow me.

~Blackstone leads Alien up the rows of books to a large, black leather bound volume with fiery red letters engraved on its spine in some strange alphebet. Opening the book, he reveals the title page, written in the common tongue -- "The Necronomicon"~

Will this do? I have over 50 translations of this volume.

Over fifty translations? Wow... I never knew there were that many... I'd take the original but I'm afraid I don't know Arabic... So a simple Latin one will do, I guess... How much will it be? I can't wait to get to summon some- I mean, to show it to Cthul- I mean... Umm... Nevermind...

Alien, are you sure you're usuing the correct persona for this transaction?

Very well, are you purchasing or renting? A purchase would be 100 crowns. A rent would be 10 crowns a day.

Correct persona?? WHAT are you talking about?? Are you referring to- nah you couldn't be... She hasn't even met Cth- whoops... I just... Well... It's a rpg we're playing that got me interested in this sort of- umm...

*gets really confused and hopes that no one will find out that she's been hanging around in a shop like this buying books like Necronomicon*

I guess renting would be enough... For now... But crowns?? I'm afraid I'm not familiar with that currency...

Gold peices. By "crowns" I mean gold peices.

I also take more modern currency: US dollars, UK pounds, Euros, Visa, Mastercard, American Express...

Ohhh, gold pieces... Sure I can pay with those... Is it ok if you get payed for each day separately as I'm not sure yet for how many days I need this...? You could either take your money from the Space Centre account or get it delivered here - however you wish...

I seeketh a tombe on air spirits. My dainty Areil obeyst me not. I have need of her help shouldst I seek to perfect my art, and helpest me she does not. Hast thou such a book, Black Soceror?

Alien, I'd prefer the crowns delivered here. If that is at all possible.

Now, for you, Prospero, I think you'll find this book will suit your needs

~Blackstone turns around and almost absentmindedly picks a volume off the shelf. It is titled: Of Air Spirits and Tempests~

ok, here's the first 10 crowns... I'll see how long I need this... Pleasure dealing with you...

*tries to find her way out*

*after having wandered around for a good while, finds the door, steps out into the sunshine and starts walking into the general direction of Aroma Café*

*a little flying droid enters through the window, drops 20 crowns onto the desk and flies away*

*A bit smeller flying droid flyes into room and steels those crowvns from the desk and tryes to buy some *.potion*

smaller!!!

* = A Personality Suppressing Potion

*Enters, noticing the droid stealing her payment. Catches the droid, takes the crowns, attaches a note to the droid saying "NO STEALING! " and lets it go.*

Blackstone, I've decided to purchase this book after all, if it's all right? I've already payed 30 crowns so is it enough if I just pay 70 more? Or do you want the whole 100 price plus the sum I've already payed for renting? Or perhaps - *wonders if she'd be able to take advantage of the fact that Irving revealed back in the café but a look into the eyes burning behind Blackstone's mask makes her drop the idea* - or nevermind...