h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Let me tell you a few stories of my progression in the world of Alternatavia...

A long long time ago, when I was but a wee teen (OK, It was 1998 and I was 13/14) I started out exploring the world of alternative music. Quite innocent I was, and I listened to a range of things - from No Doubt, to Metallica, to Queen to the Smashing Pumpkins. I began to buy the alternative magazines, and idolise my best friends older sister who liked bands such as Marilyn Manson and KoRn (when they were good), not to mention other easily accessible bands of the mid 90's. Now the roots aren't really important. By the time I was 15, I was a prefect in school, and the only person that was into heavy metal/goth/alternative music. Yes, I had the usual insults thrown at me, and well, that comes with the territory. You put up with it, and hope the insultee's catch some deadly virus and drop off the face of the planet, or at least develop some problem due to over-exposure of hairspray. I started college...made lots of new friends and suddenly noticed that all the people who used to spit on me/throw glass at me/hit me over the head with textbooks were now walking around in the latest alternative gear, claiming that they had *respected* me all along...

So I ditched the black nailvarnish, bleach and hairdye, half the clothes I used to wear...but not the music or myself...

Mock goths will eventually die out. If you are a proper part of alternative culture (no matter what part) you, like I, will have a special special radar that zones in on fakes...

It's just occurred ot me I have no idea what I am rambling on about. I think I just mean to say, that I have been there, and watched the generation of mock goths and other "mocks" grow up...it's easy to spot a fake and all that really matters is keeping your poise and grace in the face of such annoying morons...

BTW : I have no idea what I am now. My black lippy is all cob webbed. I think I just try to look both inconspicuous and creative at the same time...

Funny old world is this.

No, that makes sense. True, as well. I still see my lamented mockGoth friend here and there, in varying phases from TopShopTownie to lumberjackish sack-shirt wearer. Still figuring out who to be, and still unoriginal. I wonder, is that what happens to them all? (or is it the fate of those without imagination).

Believe it or not I actually HAVE purchased items from "trendy" stores such as TOPSHOP and Claire's Accessories. Mainly because I have a fetish for knee-high socks and tights, and they stock them. And Claire's accessories have some great glow in the dark rubbery dog collars...

But that's not what you meant!!

I often pity the poor mockGoth's. They seem trapped between our world and the trendy world. But then irritation overrides all...and I just want to batter them senseless.

Do you find that you have a radar for this kind of thing? That no matter what, you can always spot a proper goth/whatever, regardless of whether they are in a suit or full garb? Because all my friends and I seem to have it. It's a mysterious phenomenon methinks...

Gothdar...
must be the wavelength, like we're all CB radio fans with special receptors which others do not possess.

Haha!

Fantastic term!