h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

NO SPOILERS PLEASE!

I've been doing my best to avoid all news of Wimbledon for the past two weeks, as I always do when it's on because I watch the Today at Wimbledon highlights show a day late, except this year the place where I get it from stopped at day two and I haven't seen any tennis since then.

That means the further away from day 2 of Wimbledon we've been getting the harder it is to avoid news of the tournament. First I started avoiding the BBC UK news page because there was always something on there and I learned news about... Laura Robson I think her name is, then the NPR news programme I often wake up to and the other one in the afternoon, then the entire BBC news site altogether, and I had to rip Danny Baker's last two Saturday morning shows on 5Live with the sound turned so that I can listen to them later because there'll be news breaks with Wimbledon news.

NO SPOILERS PLEASE!

But that's not enough these days, oh boy no.

Everyone wants to tweet something about it, and up until this morning I had no idea whether or not Murray had gone out or who he was playing. So Twitter's out for a few days. I know Facebook would be, if I had it. The front page of YouTube had something that I just barely managed to avoid reading, and I don't even want to go to Ask h2g2 now because if Murray's won, or if he's lost, even, there's probably a conversation been started about it. I even learned the identity of one of the women finalists as a result of a story about a comment made by someone about her looks

NO SPOILERS PLEASE!

I have no idea if or when I'm going to be able to watch the rest of the tournament. I really hope so, although watching John Inverdale, John McEnroe, Tracy Austin, Lyndsey Davenport and Boris Becker after Wimbledon has shut up shop for another year and the games aren't in full swing any more will take the shine off it somewhat. It means I'll have to avoid all news for at least three or four days more, especially if Britain has its first Wimbledon mens' champion since 1936. That's a story that'll run and run and run It'll be Sir Andrew of Murray come the New Years Honours List for sure.

NO SPOILERS PLEASE!

Still, the Tour de France has been under way for a week now and I'm keeping up with that just fine

I shall be the soul of discretion.

I won't even address it elliptically in this post, lest I send you into a fury of "England F-" speculation.

It's hard to avoid things like that these days!

Don't worry about spoilers from me. I have no interest in sprots.

But you forgot to factor in the weather in your time scale...given that Wimbledon could hold the world swimming champion ships at times stick a diving board on a half closed roof and even Tom Daly could compete there.. so your estimate needs at least three or four days more

Has there been tennis on? fantastic... I managed to avoid it all entirely

Yep, tennis for the past two weeks. A week of Le Tour gone, two more to come, and the Test series starts on Wednesday

So much to follow, so little time.

Heh. I wouldn't even have known Wimbledon was on, except that my parents have been away so I've been staying in their house to care for the cats, and therefore had BBC radio on.

That said, the inside two pages of today's Irish Independent were entirely sports, which is unusual. But it was mainly hurling and the British and Irish Lions, with only a small section on tennis. (There was a photo on the cover of two Dublin hurlers kissing. A historic victory, apparently.) Actually, hurling is one of very very few sports I'd actually watch as sport, though I don't follow it at all. Any other sport, I'd watch only to pick out the cute players.

TRiG.

Well,

I've managed to avoid all news of both the womens' and mens final since the weekend, and I figured I'd got away with it. Even if I can't watch the play from day 3 onwards I know I can see the final, and that's what I was going to do this afternoon, in blissful ignorance of who won.

Until, that is, the announcer on the local classical station said "And now we're going to play Variations on Rule Britannia in honour of Andy Murray who won the Wimbledon title on Sunday".

you Jeffrey Blair!!! I thought I was safe from news by listening to your station!

And a pox on your house

There was no way you could have avoided it much longer, short of an induced coma.

Oh dear. And there was me purposely saying nothing so as to not give the game away.

You still have to watch it though. Most definitely.


Geggs

I did wonder how long you'd manage to avoid it (and it IS Tuesday already). I popped in to see how far along you'd got in your catch-up.

I disagree. I figured the further away from Sunday afternoon I got the better the chances of avoiding it. The news media has a habit of splashing stories like that all over every page it can find for a day or two, after which it's either relegated to the sports page or forgotten about altogether. And this station *never* mentions anything outside the realms of classical music, apart from the weather.

I will still watch it, Geggs. At least I'm still ignorant of the score.

The catch-up is still stalled at day 2, B. I don't know if it'll go any further now, but I hope so. It might give me something to watch on a winter's evening with a nice cuppa and a slice of

Hmmm, BBC was still re-scheduling programmes last night, and the news is still mentioning knock-on stories.

But alas and alack. Here you are. Enjoy the match.

Yep, I think I will - it looks like a marathon! It won't be today though. Maybe tomorrow once the first day of the Test match is over and done with. That should finish soon after noon Texas time

Oh no! I only watched the last game (I wasn't intending on watching it at all, but I happened to switch the TV on that moment) and it was so good I actually watched through to the conclusion. I almost never watch tennis, so it must have been good!

I kind of want to email Mr Blair and point out the irony of him playing something like Rule Britannia... for a Scotsman There must be plenty of Scots-written or Scots-related classical music such as Mendelssohn's Hebrides Overture (Fingal's Cave) or Malcom Arnold's Four Scottish Dances that would have been more appropriate.

Okay, the poem 'Rule Britannia' was written after the Acts of Union and by a Scot, so, strictly speaking, it includes Scotland, but I doubt the Scots really feel that way about it and would prefer something of a more Caledonian nature.

Here's how sprots aware I am. You say a Scot won Wimbledon and I wonder if he defeated blancmange from outer space?

Thank you BG. Given the number of people I've mentioned that sketch to, I was starting to think I was the only person who remembered it.

At least now we know for certain that the blancmange's dastardly plan would not work.


Geggs

That's ringing some distant bells, but you're going to have to clue me in.