h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

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*LeRue walks down the langth of the barracks down as far as his office, he enters and dials a phone number from memory*

Yah, Its me. Listen I nedd a favour...

*LeRue explains the details to his "Man" and hangs up. He checks his watch and heads toward the Brig*

*LeRue enters and puts his rifle in his gun safe, he sits on his swivel seat and nods off*

Can you repeat this last post as I don't know if the s will get around to replacing it soon

Ignore the last post

Ignored.

*erases his RAM*

*The Colonel knocks on the door*

Knock knock, hows things going

*leaps out of the chair and starts to shuffle paper and slap at his keyboard*

Just reflecting on such a hard days work I put down... my have you lost some weight m'am?

Don't worry Captain, I can't remember the last time I slept, probably when I was in the hands of Shiva

Was Shiva female....?

*allows his mind to wander*

No he was the one with 4 arms and a strange taste in........interrogation

Okkkkaaaayyyy, well at least its an exciting life.

So0 what can I do for you my Colonel

Well I need some idea's about what to do about my ex husband, he's set this whole thing up with the reporter just to get his hands on some deeds to an old church he signed over to me as a tax dodge but something in here

*Pat's her stomach*

Tells me that's not all

Weeellll I always find a good Red Alert would really get him talking.

Or sensory deprovation... or there is this thing I learned in afghanistan where you get a red hot darning needle, butter and human.

Or we could get some really deep shit on him and blackmail him.

Weeeeeeeeelllllll now you come to mention it I have got some stuff suitable for blackmail, I tried to tell him I'd do it but he wouldn't listen, hang on here and I'll go and get it

* out of office to her office retrieves the folder and back*

see what you think of this

*Hands over file*

*looks at the folder for quite some time*

*gets to the middle page*

*rotates around for some time*


Now that just looks painful.

Well that's what he's into, the woman in the photos is known as Mistress Belinda

Ahhhh a Lady of Negotionable Affection....

*reads some more of the folder*

Wow thoses prices are really high... notthatiwouldknowanythingaboutthatsortofthinghehehehehehehe.

*Smirks*

I don't think it applies to you, not with what I've read on your file, talk about your 'Silver tongued Irishman'

And I don't think Affection comes into it either,

so do we present him with the facts and say we'll Special Delivery them to VP Kinsey

*squels like a child on christmas*

yes, yes OH GOD YES.