h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hmm, might be a good idea; perhaps we could suggest the idea to the BBC; they could do a drama of the night of the hoover, and from that we might get a film deel for the moovie?

Why do I have a feeling that a large part of the movie will take place in pubs?

Because pubs can be very dusty?

(cont.)

Scene One:

The moonlit silouette disolves into a pint of bitter on the wood of a bar of a pub. No faces are seen at this point, only the pints of the patrons, with the odd dribble of beer or crumb from a pie falling through the frame. The voice of the pint speaks:

"I don't know, I'm a little confused about the whole thing but I think I'm starting to understand. Just last night I posted to a thread where I said...."

The voice trails off as a flashback begins, this time to another computer screen where the words are typed:

"But, have we not established that neither of you are here, and therefore neither of you are reading or contributing to this thread?
Does that put me in a rather untenible position?
Do I care seeing as how I most definatly can't exist, beauty and inteligence this intense is by its nature surely not possible?"

The flashback fades back to the present where we see the pint again, this time almost empty. This is the point where the viewer begins to realise that the owner of the pint is in fact talking to no one, except perhaps the publican, Harry.

"I'll have another, Harry."

A full and dewy pint is slid into frame and almost immediately raised out of frame.

(Over rim of beer)

"And a packet of crisps, just like in the book!"

A packet of roast beef and pickled onion crisps is tossed on the bar.

""

The dialogue continues punctuated by long draughts of beer and crunches of crisps.

"So anyway, a little later in the evening I said..."

Still another flashback, this time the viewer is getting a little annoyed at this hackneyed plot developer.

On the screen appear these words:

"I canciled something once, can't remember what it was.
Never canciled lunch before.
The man on the radio just said something.
enditment."

Those quotes from teh cancal thread, sound strangely famuliar I was, if I remember, very* drunk when I typed those

It all evens out.. I was sober when I read them.

Hoh Yus, it all evens out in the end.
But of course the end is the beginning.
We started at the end, and will begin again at the end, and the end, is not the end but only the beginning of the end again, for what comes around goes around, and in its going around it goes around again and causes itself to go around again, and thus, for all eternity the dust goes round and round and round, and the storey goes round and round and round, and the lampposts stand tall against the tides of the unbelievers, smitted be their dust-ridden existance, rotten be their tomatos, and enter they not into the circle of eternal going around and around and around, oh yea.

is the narrator morris" friend?

I think that zoomer is officially our scriptwriter for the Nighthoover movie.

And I think that if this movie was ever made, it should be a short film with a load of surrealist animation segments.

And I think the narrator of this story, which has nothing to do with the existance or nonexistance of a Nighthoover movie, at least so far, though of course it has everything to do with the existance or nonexistance of the Great Prophet Nighthoover itself, which is of course not really a questionable issue since we all know, believe, are certain that nighthoover really does exist and will indeed return to us one day, oh yea, oh glorious day of all days when we shall once again have our nocturnal dust-sucking saviour - this narrator is quite definitely not befriended with Morris Semchevsky, if only due to the fact that the former is trying to kill the latter, which is the sort of action that is not usually done among friends, unless of course one of the friends had done something utterly horrible, such as doubting the existance of Our Prophet of the Night the great nighthoover, one true son of the one true bob, but since this is not the case here I do believe you can quite safely say that they are not friends, though of course the third part of this multi-chaptered saga is being written on the cancel thread even as we speak, metaphorically speaking of course since this isn't really speech, just a bunch of written posts, so you can really never know what will come of everything at the end. Does that answer your question, dear?

And, of course, the moovie can't go on 'general release', but only be shown in 'art cinima's' Agree with surreal animation scenes, between nighthooverly bits of moovie, surreal, totally seemingly unconnected surreal animation, of feet, bricks, lemons and tomatos, talking and swinging on ropes, and frlying over ponds, and sailing on the edge of the sky, oh yea

...or surreal animation of bits from the thread, like the crazy stories you had thre on the earlier days. Some brilliant stuff by you and Looneytunes.

I had a look back for them a while ago, but coldn't locate where abouts they were.... how far into the thread were they, if you can remember?

Somewhere around the early hundreds, I think... don't really remember.

Yeh; I just read the first couple hundred posts and there is some sort of about the late 100's early 200's but its spread out more than I remember with the general song singing drinking and anaarch madness and weidness and
Aphrodite, Apollo, Ares, Artemis, Athena, Demeter, Dionysus, Hephaestus, Hera, Hermes, Poseidon and Zeus nod sagely
as well

Of course they are... in a way. When they're not too busy bickering, or having sex with mortals, or destroying things.

But that bit seems familiar, is it from the thread?

yes Think it was loonytunes in reply to one of my 'storeys' about post 200 something ,

I wondered what's happened to loonytunes so I went to his space, and it actually said he had 'no recent postings'... !

Yeh; I did that, I do it ever now and then for a fair few peo;le I don't se enowdays often;' but looking through the posts the most recent one I easily* saw was only three* weeks ago! think they're still about just a lot* less frenquently Im not entirely sure how the 'last post' thing works but I think it only looks* at the last twenty posts in theire list; which can be recent (if there subscirbed to ask or peer revier), and hide up posts theire recently made scuse my typing I'm drunk as a drunk drunk drunk nighthoover priest qwell, not that* drunk, but my typing has certainly gone to the wall

Yes it has...

I feel quite tired this morning... afternoon... can't think why