A Conversation for Terrapins
What do ya fink
Researcher 110796 Started conversation Apr 2, 2000
I'm quite proud of my first entry shame the pics and links didn't go though
What do ya fink
Mike A (snowblind) Posted Apr 3, 2000
Hi Urchin.
It's 10.11pm GMT right now so I'll read this tomorrow, ok?
You'll probably want to cancel the other terrapin article, though...
What do ya fink
Mike A (snowblind) Posted Apr 4, 2000
Yippi-ki-yay!
You don't half come online in the late hours don't you?
What do ya fink
Researcher 110796 Posted Apr 4, 2000
I'm a man of the night Mike A, oh yea whats this conversation meant to be about.... 'butler whispers in ear'.....
Oh good terrapins, the rulers of the universe barring Iron maiden... of course.
What do ya fink
Mike A (snowblind) Posted Apr 5, 2000
Well, here's my comments:
Loose the second paragraph.
Don't bother with any HTML.
Use some paragraphing on the second last paragraph (if my memory's going wrong then it's the one where you listed all those species of terrapins), don't have it all bunched up.
You need -loads- more facts. What about wild terrapins, breeding, migration etc? This is all off the top of my head. Also, don't write too much about how to look after each species as a pet. Just write a paragraph about things you need with each species, and then do a few lines for each one on how it's done differently.
Finally, you need to sort out your style. You will probably get away with it for now, the subbie will just change it. But I reckon you will want to stop going "well there very cool so much man". Your grammar sucks too.
I bet you haven't clicked the submit button yet...
What do ya fink
Researcher 110796 Posted Apr 9, 2000
Well Mike A if I do anything wrong you can break my arm if I call you a dipshit cheers for the tips
Hate Urchin
What do ya fink
Mike A (snowblind) Posted Apr 9, 2000
Still got needless HTML in it.
Still no paragraphing where I said there should be
Still a lack of facts
Still not submitted
The other article you did, still not cancelled.
Oh, btw, you still interested in Name That Tune? Go to the end of that thread, and there'll be a link to the new thread. C u there 
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What do ya fink
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