How To Wear Water Around Your Neck...

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Redfish by Amy Ant

The problem:

As we know from experience, summertime can be very hot at times even, surprisingly enough, in the UK.

In its useful article titled '
Hot weather risks'
the BBC News Online does point out the dangers associated with dehydration:

'One of the biggest dangers of a heat wave is the increased risk of dehydration.

This is the loss of water from the body, and with it important blood salts like potassium and sodium which play a vital role in the function of organs such as the kidneys, brain and heart.

It can lead to confusion, lethargy and problems with breathing and heart rate.'

So, it is very important to drink a certain amount of liquid in these cases to avoid the effect of dehydration.

But, if you keep buying drinks every time you are thirsty, it can be very expensive as well.

The following advice can also be found on the BBCi page:

'If you have no alternative, but to travel in a hot, stuffy environment - for instance on the Tube - then make sure you carry a bottle of water with you.'

Fair enough but, if the journey is a long one, it could also mean having to bring quite a few bottles with us and in the process having to carry a very heavy bag.

So, is there another way of surviving hot weather?

The solution:

Following a challenge on the issue of wearing water a while ago, we succeeded in finding a rather simple but efficient solution to that particular problem:

  1. Find a flexible plastic tube of a reasonable length and width1 then seal one end2.
  2. Fill it up with water (you can add some diluted juice to make it more colourful).
  3. Seal the other end.
  4. Tie both ends together.
  5. Freeze it (not compulsory).
  6. Put it around your neck.

Here you are: an original and priceless DIY 'water necklace' that can be very useful if you are thirsty while saving you the hassle of carrying bottles.

The principle can also be adapted for bracelets and even belts so, if you plan a long walk outside, you can actually wear water or any liquid all over your body.

And, of course, it can be used for those hot and sweaty clubbing nights. In this case, you can fill the necklaces up with whatever beverage you want3, but the more colourful the better. They will beat those boring neon necklaces from a start, and, at least, they will save you quite a lot of money in the process too.

Advice for when making a DIY 'water necklace'.

Some people have attempted to make 'ice necklaces' by using special moulds. We definitely advise against it for one of the reasons mentioned below.

  1. If you intend to freeze your 'necklace'4, never forget to put the liquid into a plastic tube first as hot weather or environment will make your 'necklace' melt very quickly5.
  2. Never put your necklace into the freezer while still wearing it.

You are now ready to enjoy safely the results of making a DIY 'water necklace'.

Alternative uses for the 'necklaces':

The use of DIY 'water necklaces' in vampires slaying.

To all the wannabe vampires slayers out there, we strongly recommend wearing those 'water necklaces' while on patrol. They can be very effective against vampires' attacks due to the fact that they are more discreet than the usual weapons and definitely less smelly than garlic necklaces. All you need to do is to fill them up with holy water instead of drink6 Then, while under attack from the undeads, you just need to pull the necklace off your neck, open one side, and empty the whole content on your assailants.

It works like a charm...

Don't forget: you can wear as many as you want, and it doesn't have to be only necklaces; 'water bracelets' and 'belts' are as much effective.

Another advantage (apart from the fact that you won't waste precious time taking a bottle out of your bag and struggling with that darn screwed top at the worst moment) is that, if you are stopped and searched by the police, you won't get into trouble at all as possession of 'water necklaces' is not illegal yet.

Adapting the idea for the smokers.

With smoking being frown upon by more people these days and the near impossibility to smoke in public spaces, smokers are reduced to go outside to have a puff or two. It is fine when the weather is alright, but it is rather a punitive and cruel ordeal when it is pouring down with rain or/and freezing.

Thinking of the ever-reducing minority that is the smoking community, here is what to do to transform 'water necklaces' into 'smoke ones':

  1. Find a flexible plastic tube then seal one end (no changes there).
  2. Blow some smoke from your cigarette in it.
  3. Seal the other end.
  4. Tie both ends together.
  5. Do not freeze it.
  6. Put it around your neck.

That's it; you are now ready to cope at last with those almost inevitable situations when you are surrounded by judgemental non-smokers. Not only you will not get wet or catch a cold anymore (you just need to find a space away from the health conscious mob without even having to put a foot outside) to fill your lungs with that so much needed intake of nicotine but, you will also be able to recycle your smoke by blowing it again into the container for use at another time7.

So, as you can see, the 'smoke necklaces' are not only important and discreet devices for the smoking community but, also, very valuable money-saving ones at the same time.


29.04.04 Front Page

Back Issue Page

1Depending on how much liquid you expect to drink...2You might have a surprise if you don't...3As long as you're not underage for alcoholic beverages that is...4Even if you don't intend to freeze it, the result will still be messy if you don't follow this advice...5Hence our advice against making 'ice necklaces'...6You could also add some odourless garlic drops though, just in case some of the vampires you encounter are die-hard atheists...7At your own health's risk though.

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