h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

West Ham United have confirmed the permanent signings of Carlos Tevez and Javier MAscarenho from Corinthians, a story first broken on tevez's personal website.

What the...?

Huh? How did they manage that??

I'm dead impressed.

But it does remind me that on ChampMan, I've just signed Shevchenko for Scunthorpe.

B

Imagine the look on Fergies face!


Mah hah hah!!!!

I thought it was a season long loan with view to permanent signings if the Hammers managed to find the cash (around 30 mill for the pair)

But ive been wrong before.

It'll be interesting to see how they do at a mediocre Premiership team, I mean the legendary Roque Junior was a World Cup winner after all...

Must be something to do with Media Sports Investments, who own the rights to Tevez and Mascherano. Allegedly both players will get large slices of any future transfer moves.

Should make the top half of the table much more interesting now...

"I mean the legendary Roque Junior was a World Cup winner after all..."

The difference being that Brazil had such a massively talented midfield that all he needed to do was make a rescue header once in a while when playing for them. Hence not a lot of energy was expended and he could let himself get chubby and unfit.

Need we examine the talent of the Leeds midfield?

B

Are you impling Nick Barmby, Paul Okon, Stephen McPhail and an 8 year old James Milner weren't a world class midfield? Ah. I get what you were saying...


Back on topic, doesn't Roman Watsisface own part of the company that represents these two?

And meanwhile, at 10 minutes to minute (wasn't that an Iron Maiden song?), Ashley Cole is still an Arsenal player.

Cutting it fine, aren't they?

B

Did they make it in time? I could just mosey on over to BBC Sport or something, but I'm lazy...

Not as far as I can tell.

Last that BBC Sport got was Spurs signing Chimbonda at precisely midnight.

B

Well, Cole for Gallas.

And if I'm right, Chelsea now only have five defenders- ferreira, carvalho, terry, Cole, Brifge. plus Geremi and Essien who are midfielders who have played in defence. leaves them a bit light, doesn't it?

Yeah, they do look a bit light. Then again, the thing I noticed is that Arsenal now have a grand total of 1 English player anywhere near their first team squad. That's disgraceful.

You're forgetting Boulahrouz

B

and the iron maiden song was "2 minutes to midnight" i think

Actually, it's 2 - Hoyte and Walcott, but I agree with you - and they're going to be in trouble if Blatter's suggestions for 6 home-grown players in each match-day squad come in at some point in the near future.

i DID COMPLETELY FORGET bOULAHROUZ, YOU'RE RIGHT.

For once, I agree with Blatter's propesed changes. I mean, look at Scotland for starters...

Actually, I lie. I agreed with making the women play in tight shorts and push up sports bras.

<>


Yeah? Actually, we've been producing non-stop shite for quite a while now, although it's starting to look up now. Celtic actually had *seven* Scots in the team a coupla weeks back. Downside is, we're crap compared to about three or four years ago.

But economics screwed Scotland, not FIFA.