h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

how_do_i_make_my_housemate_MOVE_OUT.iT'S_GOT_BEYOND_A_JOKE_NOW.NEVER_LIVE_WITH_A_STANDUP_COMEDIAN.ALSO_HOW_DO_I_FIX_MY_SPACEBAR?

That entry suggests that they're utterly obnoxious and you can't stand it.

The only idea that leaps to mind (assuming you don't like the direct approach) is to out-obnoxious them; find the weak spot that your roommate can't stand and keep it up until s/he cracks.

Of course, talking about the problem and demanding a resolution would be the calmest and sanest way to go....if reason and politeness don't work, try the above.

Fruitbat

Very simple. If he's a stand-up comedian, buy a cymbal, and carry it round with you. Whenever he cracks a weak joke, bash the cymbal (in a "boom-tish" fashion). He'll soon leave. (Or punch you.)

You might like to visit the entry called "How to annoy people".

OK from "don't get mad... get Even" Alan Abel ISBN0-283-99018-X

If you rent, get the Landlord to evict both of you (after planning it with him/her) as soon as yuo both move out, change locks and move back in. To do this you will have to convince landlord the other tennant is a risk to the property (the authors house mate was an arsonist!)

CH

Fill your house with mice and cockroaches. Nobody would want to live there then!

but what good would that do?

and what exactly's wrong with your spacebar?

It would make the house mate move out!

And there is nothing wrong with my space bar as I have now demonstrated however you may want to take this issue up with
Mikey Digital who is clearly so infuriated by his house mate that spaces are a triviality to him.

Oops. I mean to ask him.

Alas, I don't think it would make my family move out.