h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*retreats up the air vent*
*seals vent*

*Finds a terribly convenient vent in the floor and gingerly eases the suspect packages down the vent and seals it*

Okay...and just in case...*pours perfume all round the vent's cover*

*returns*
Hmmm......you forgot the mud that's already here. The mud that's just......don't look down.

*Looks down*

Oh! I seem to have two mud pies on my feet!

I suggest you leg it. For our sake.

*rest of mud bubbles threateningly*

Uh oh.

What the heck is it doing?!!!

*With the degree of chivalry common to the English male, BS legs it.*

Dunno, but I ain't staying to find out .

*Tries to move towards her fleeing companions, but has difficulty due to the mud on her feet*

Hoy! Don't leave! I'm sure it can't smell that bad!

Baldrickkkkkkk! How do I get this stuff off?

Oh, icky!

*Holds her nose, breathes through her mouth while running backwards.*

Greebo's bedroom is never going to be the same.

Ermmmmmm....it can smell that bad. Only one solution.

*drops six Suspect Packages*

I have a feeling that it might be proficient to hide. Except you Gwennie.

*hides*

Why do I get the feeling this is going to be unpleasant?

*Pulls a paper bag over her head*

*BOOM*
*BANG*
*BA-BASH*
*BOOM*
*BING*
*BANG*

*Greebo's bedroom is filled with a long and sticky silence as Gwen stands, still with the paper bag over her head*

Hello? *Silence* Is it safe for me to remove my paper bag yet? *More silence following by the dripping of mud* Hello?

Yup. The only thing that can solve Havoc Mud is more Havoc Mud from a different package. The mud cancels itself out.

*Charlie Chan voice:* Most efficient, young one.

*Experiences a sudden stabbing pain. Her face returns to normal.*

OWWWWCH!

Welcome back.

Yep, works!

Don't you mean ?

Yes, that is exactly what I meant.

*A sudden scream comes from Gwennie, and she no longer looks like Fergie. Now she looks like Gwennie covered in stinky mud.*

*Mari-rae makes a sudden move and grabs Baldrick. He struggles, but she has him caught. An evil glint comes into her eye.*

I've got him! What should we do with him?

Ermmmmmmm......nothing?

*squirms some more*