h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

nadia,
This story had many dark twists and turns, even unto the final paragraphs. Your vivid descriptions, your use of what appears to be a 'foreign syntax' and 'cultural mythology' kept my attention from beginning to end. Instead of explaining the mythos, your characters lived within the boundaries of their influence and the reader sees them act upon that inherited knowledge. The way you painted John Brown through Lushka's eyes, you tempered with an outside perspective, as well as his personal revelation concerning his feelings for Lushka. That was a surprising twist, and well accomplished. Your descriptions of the father's (Vorya) talk with his daughter (Lushka) and how the firelight tinged his features as he spoke, lent an intense quality to what he said to her.

There was an undercurrent of something intimated, though not stated, that intrigued me. It had to do with the relationships suggested between the young man and the young woman, in counterpoint to that of the young woman and the Rusalka. It seemed to me that Lushka had an underlying misgiving of getting married to a man. It seemed to me Lushka sought out the darker side of a beauty embodied by the Rusalka, another female figure. That issue was almost mitigated by the mother when she expressed to her daughter that she had once felt the same thing, but had found marriage to be not as frightening as she'd expected. I noted the mother also did not extol the relationship with high praise; it seemed she had simply accepted what was prepared for her, rather than crossing the boundary into the nether world. In the end, your character Lushka appears to have determined her mother's choice could not be her choice; that she had an opportunity to 'live' a different lifestyle, heedless of the cost. I can think of a modern-day equivalent to this quandry, and I'm curious if that's what you had in mind to portray.

My estimation of this tale ranks high. Its tone is somber, yet hopeful; its message is multi-faceted. Your use of a mythological creature in conjunction with real people meshed well into a tale that will endure for its pathos, its subplot, its imagery, and its characters. Keep writing tales such as this; you will gratify a reading audience and make a name for yourself in the world of books.

B4ifindmyownwritersvoice2sharethestoriesihave2tell

nadia,
Do you still check back on your older works? Do you still have this one on file? I left a few questions for you, and it seems you hadn't seen them to respond. Care to do that now?

B4theBeebfinallyclosesthisdown&inevergetmyanswers