h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Well done Zem,this gave me a great insight into what it is to be a matress. As a direct descendant of an ape named Ug, I have never stretched the cellular jelly with which I think to empathise with the spring-pocketed creatures on which I sleep. Thank you.

I loved your explanation of the life of a mattress. I'm so glad you cleared it up for me. I thought a mattress died when you removed it from it's home in the swamp and dried it out. But, I feel so strange! What will my Fiancee' say when he discovers I've been spending my nights atop something beside him? Well, maybe I shouldn't worry, my mattress probably swings the other way. It is called a "queen".

Thanks for your kind words. My only problem now is: what do I write as a follow-up? I was thinking maybe something to do with writing successfully. I'm currently co-writing a novel (with MaW, if you wanted to know). It seems to be going quite well, but every author has to be wary of pitfalls.