Through the Doughnut Hole

3 Conversations

... and now ladies, gentlemen and others, please put your hands, paws, fins,
goinks1 together for another
Through the Doughnut Hole!!!!

smiley - musicalnoteHey everyone let's dance around a
pole...smiley - musicalnote
smiley - musicalnoteand sit back and enjoy another Through the Doughnut
Hole!!smiley - musicalnote2

Cough Please

Hello everyone and welcome to another Doughnut Hole, packed with guests, oozing with

good conversation and just a sprinkling of fun.

I was watching 'The Core' on DVD the other day, I saw it at the cinema and enjoyed it so
much that I just had to go out and get myself a copy3. Now I have a perplexing problem, it seems for
a little jest, the makers decided to keep me on the hook and introduce something fishy to the
infamous Trafalgar Square scene. I won't of course ruin the plot for anyone who hasn't seen it, but
the Trafalgar Square scene has a large amount of pigeons going slightly barmy, and somewhere in all
the flapping is one lone little trout. If anyone does spot this sad little fish, please do let me know,
oh what wags these film people are!!!

Okay, enough of films, on with the show, two weeks ago I gave you a question to answer, and for
those with the memory of a goldfish4 here's a reminder of what it was.

If there was a single person to govern the whole world, who would you choose to
be that person?


My first guest this week is a wonderful person who has been refused a Knighthood from the

on numerous occasions. He is a kind and gracious man who doesn't really care who knows about his
Athletes Foot problem it is of course the ever itchy Marjin

who started this conversation.

'I do not think any human being will be strong enough to resist the temptation of
misusing that awful power, especially I mistrust the ones the would like our votes for that job.

The only one that might come near does not exist, so my vote goes to...

...Gandalf the White. smiley - ok'

Ah the wizard who finally found out how to get those dirty greys to look sparkling white... hmmm,
you maybe right Marjin, but I don't entirely trust a person who had to get washing instructions from

a Balrog. After all was the fight not over a packet of detergent? I think I'm right you know.


My second guest on this weeks show is none other than Frenchbean, a masterful gardener and book reader extraordinaire who in

same conversation said....

'I too would avoid those who show any interest whatsoever in wielding power - so
people to avoid: Arnie, Bush, Hitler, Atilla the Hun, Genghis Kan, Napoleon (we can go on and on here,

can't we).

Appointment of supreme ruler should be based on two conditions:
  1. An inability to lie, tell porkies, fib, or be 'economical with the truth'; and
  2. Having no desire whatsoever to be the leader of the known world.

Yes, but who? I'm still looking'

Thanks Frenchbean, you'll have to let us know if ever you find anyone who fills your conditions.
Personally I think you might be on an impossible quest, but then, this might have been an impossible
question to answer.


My third guest this week is someone you all know and love, because it is the all knowing and all
loving Jodan in this conversation

'If I could choose one person to rule the world, it would be me. Naturally.

My policies-
smiley - donut - More free parking!
smiley - donut - Less crime
smiley - donut - More money
smiley - donut - Less death

Der you go smiley - winkeye

PS - second choice, Arnold'

~grin~ Your policies seem okay, but I don't see anything about more doughnuts for poor little
orange and black cats. That should be the main one you go with, why else would people want to vote
for you?


My fourth and final guest this week won't be a surprise, as he put in the most appearances during
last seasons show. So without further ado, here's Deus Ex Machina
in this conversation

'Finally, a new edition of the Doughnut Hole! And two awards for me? I'm very

So, who shall rule the world? Let's have an election, California-style! Anyone can run, as long as they
know what 1+1 is! And even if you don't, run anyway! We don't care, since it's all a popularity
contest anyway because the most famous movie star who enters will win! Actual political ability is
not required!'

Yes indeed Deus, it is a new season of Doughnut Holes, and you much deserved the awards from last season.

Is that irony I sense in your conversation this week... sort of rounds this week off well doesn't it... seeing as
we started with washing clothing. Not that I like ironing at all, in fact I'd vote for anyone who made it illegal, even if they couldn't add 1 shirt + 1 iron = disaster!!


It's always good solving those little problems that perplex us isn't it, makes you feel better and
that all is right with the world. That is until you think up an entirely new question to perplex
yourself with, and the idea of having to think up a question to perplex yourself with is perplexing in
itself. So to save you the bother I shall come up with a new question for you to solve, or deliberate
over and maybe another article just like this one but with different words will spring forth from
The Post and onto your computer screens.

So today's question is... roll of drums...

Have you ever been caught out 'pulling a
sicky' (having a day off work/school and telling a lie about the reason5)?

We have all done it, or have we? Wanted a day off work or school when we weren't entitled to
one. Tell us about the excuse you made up, and where you caught out? I am sure the viewers will be
very interested to know. Tell us all about it in a conversation below. As before I will use whatever
facts, information or silliness in a future Doughnut Hole.

Of course you can also enter into any of the conversations featured on this page.

Next Please!!

Oh time does fly when you are having fun doesn't it? Another Doughnut Hole over, so many
wonderful guests, how proud they must be to have met me, something they will remember for the rest
of theirs lives. Such joy...

This weeks article is brought to by The Post and a rather large trout floating somewhere in
Trafalgar Square, London.

Share and Enjoy!!

Through the Doughnut Hole


23.10.03 Front Page

Back Issue Page

1I am not going to ask, maybe you should...2Music by Luvwig Von Bakeoven, Lyrics by
Vogon Scratchurelf.
3If you find this sad please keep it to yourself... me is very fragile at the moment... ~wink~4Hmmm... more fish, this is getting
5Illness / Granny died / Granny's funeral / Transport broke down / Hidden behind a hedge so the school bus never stopped to pick you up6 etc. etc.6I of course never did this.. I am just making these excuses up for your benefit!!!

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